最簡單的英文小笑話閱讀

　　前蘇聯著名作家高爾基說過,“哪裡有人,哪裡就有笑聲。”從古到今,笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調劑品”。小編精心收集了最簡單的英文小笑話，供大家欣賞學習!

　　最簡單的英文小笑話：roast pig

　　A gentleman was invited for dinner. When he hurried there and sat down, he was happy to see a roast pig in front of his seat:"Not bad, I am next to the pig." But then he noticed the angry fat lady sitting next to him. He faked a smile and added: "Oh I am sorry, I meant the roasted one on the table."

　　烤乳豬

　　一位先生去赴宴遲到了，匆忙入座後，發現自己的座位正對著乳豬，於是大為高興的說：“還不錯，我坐在乳豬的旁邊。”這時才發現身旁的一位胖女士正怒目相視，他忙陪笑改口到：“對不起，我說的是那隻烤好的。”

　　最簡單的英文小笑話：一個吝嗇的傢伙

　　Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town.

　　"Let’s go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven’t been anywhere for a long time."

　　Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, "All right, but I’m not going to spend much money. We’ll look at things, but we won’t buy anything. "

　　They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt’s wife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.

　　Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane.

　　"Fun flights!" the notice said, " $ 10 for 10 minutes.

　　Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn’t want to have to pay for his wife, as well.

　　"I’ve only got $ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilot wasn’t selling many tickets, so he said, "I’ll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn’t scream or shout, she can have a free flight."

　　Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.

　　The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flying upside down.

　　When the plane landed, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn’t make a sound. She can have her ride free."

　　"Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn’t easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."

　　最簡單的英文小笑話：Back Up Two Miles

　　退後兩英里

　　A farmer and his son, traveling by horse and buggy up a narrow lane, met a motorist going the other way. There was no room to pass for two miles in either direction. The motorist, in hurry, honked his horn .

　　"If you don't back up," said the farmer, rolling up his sleeves, I won't like what I'm going to have to do." The surprised driver put his car in reverse and backed up two miles, allowing the horse and buggy to go by. "What was it you wouldn't have liked to have done back there?" asked the farmer's son.

　　"Back up two miles," replied the farmer.

　　一位農夫和他的兒子乘坐輕便馬車來到一段窄路，他們遇到一個開車的人向相反的方向去。兩個方向的兩英里以內都沒有地方可以使他們相擦而過。駕車人甚是著急，按響了喇叭。 “如果你不後退，”農夫說著擼起了袖子，“我可不喜歡我將不得不做的事。”司機吃驚不小，掛上倒擋，向後退了兩英里，讓輕便馬車先過去。

　　“剛才在那兒你說過的你不喜歡要做的事是什麼?”農夫的兒子問道。

　　“退後兩英里，”農夫回答道。