英語腦筋急轉彎的小故事

General 更新 2024年11月26日

  腦筋急轉彎非常有趣,可以你的壓力和疲倦,緩解你的精神緊迫感。下面就是小編給大家帶來的,希望大家喜歡!

  一:

  Satan greets him: "Welcome Mr. Gates, we've been waiting for you. This will be your home for all eternity. You've been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life. Now, since you've got me in a good mood, I'll be generous and give you a choice of three places in which you'll be locked up forever.

  Satan takes Bill to a huge lake of fire in which millions of poor souls are tormented and tortured. He then takes him to a massive coliseum where thousands of people are chased about and devoured by starving lions. Finally, he takes Bill to a tiny room in which there is a bottle of the finest wine sitting on a table. To Bill's delight, he sees a PC in the corner. Without hesitation, Bill says "I'll take this option."

  "Fine," says Satan, allowing Bill to enter the room. Satan locks the room after Bill.

  As he turns around, he bumps into Lucifer. "That was Bill Gates!" cried Lucifer. "Why did you give him the best place of all!"

  "That's what everyone thinks" snickered Satan.

  "The bottle has a hole in it!"

  "What about the PC?"

  "It's got Windows 95!" laughed Satan.

  "And it's missing three keys,"

  "Which three?"

  "Control, Alt and Delete."

  二:

  With the recent problems being encountered by Windows users all across the country, people are begin to ask themselves if windows is a virus. In response to the high demand for an answer to that question a study was done and concluded the following.

  1. Viruses replicate quickly.

  Windows does this.

  2. Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so.

  Windows does this.

  3. Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk.

  Windows does this.

  4. Viruses are usually carried, unkown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems.

  Windows does that too.

  5. Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow ***see 2*** and the user will buy new hardware.

  Same with Windows, yet again.

  Maybe Windows really is a virus.

  Nope! There is a difference!

  Viruses are well supported by their authors, are frequently updated, and tend to become more sophisticated as they mature. So there! Windows is not a virus.

  三:

  1. You can't surf the Web from a couch with a beer in one hand and Doritos in the other.

  2. Set-top boxes don't beep and whine when you hook up to HBO.

  3. You just can't find those cool Health Rider infomercials on the Web.

  4. Seinfeld never slows down when a lot of people tune in.

  5. Even the worst TV shows never excuse themselves with an "Under Construction" sign.

  6. A remote control has fewer buttons than a keyboard.

  7. The family never argues over which Web site to visit this evening.

  8. There are fewer grating color schemes on TV--even on MTV.

  9. When was the last time you tuned in to "Melrose Place" and got a "Error 404" message?

  10. It doesn't take minutes to build the picture when you change TV channels.

  四:

  ***一***A painting cotractor was speaking to a woman about a job. She sad she wanted the first room a pale blue. He wrote it down, went to the window opened it and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP." They walked into the second room and she said she wanted it a soft yellow color. He wrote that down, went to the window opened it and yelled, "GREEN SIDE UP." The woman was curious but didn't say anything. They walked into the third room and she said she wanted a warm rose color. The painter wrote that down and went to the window and opened it, he yelled "GREEN SIDE UP." Finally the woman asked, "why do you keep yelling that out the window?" "I'm sorry," he replied, "but I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street.

  ***二***A young blonde executive was leaving the office one evening when she noticed the CEO standing in front of the shredder with a piece of paper in his hand. "Listen," said the CEO, "this is important, and my assistant has left for the day. Can you make this thing work?" "Certainly," she replies, flattered that the CEO had askedher for help. She turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the START button. "Excellent!" replied the CEO, "I'll need two copies."

  五:

  Steve, a party magician, is carrying three pieces of gold each piece weighing one kilogram.

  On the way to a session he comes to a bridge which has a sign posted saying the bridge could hold only a maximum of 80 kilograms.

  Steve weighs 78 kilograms and the gold weighs three kilograms.

  He reads the sign and still safely crossed the bridge with all the gold.

  How did he manage this?

  answer:

  Steve is a juggler. When he came to the bridge he juggled the gold, always keeping one piece in the air.
 


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