輕鬆生活英語趣味小故事

　　“哪裡有人,哪裡就有笑聲。”從古到今,笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調劑品”。笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆，在人們的日常生活中起著重要調劑作用。下面小編為大家帶來，歡迎大家閱讀!

　　：我什麼也沒做

　　One day a man came home from work to find total chaos in the house. The kids were laying outside in the mud, still in their pajamas.

　　When he opened the door, he found an even bigger mess: dishes on the counter, dog food spilled on the floor, a broken glass under the table and a pile of sand by the back door. The family room was strewn with toys, and a lamp had been knocked over.

　　He headed up the stairs, stepping over toys, to look for his wife. He was becoming worried that she might be ill or that something terrible had happened to her.

　　He found her in the bedroom still in bed with her pajamas on, reading a magazine.

　　She looked up at him, smiled and asked how his day had gone.

　　He looked at her, bewildered***困惑的***, and asked, "What happened here today?"

　　She again smiled and answered, "You know, every day, you come home from work and ask me what I did today."

　　"Yes," was his reply.

　　She answered, "Well, today, I didn't do it!"

　　一天，一個人下班回到家，發現屋子外面一片狼籍。孩子們還穿著睡衣，滿身是泥地躺在外面。

　　開啟房門，他發現屋子裡面更亂。櫥櫃上堆著盤子，地上散落著狗食，桌子下面有一隻打碎的玻璃杯，後門旁還有一堆沙子。家庭娛樂室裡堆滿了玩具，還有一盞燈翻倒在地上。

　　他邁過散落在樓梯上的玩具，上樓去找他的妻子。他開始擔心她生病了或是發生了什麼可怕的事情。

　　他發現她還穿著睡衣躺在床上，在看一本雜誌。

　　她抬頭看到他，笑著問他今天過得怎麼樣。

　　他看著她，困惑地問：“今天發生什麼事情了?”

　　她笑著問道：“你每天下班回家都會問我今天做什麼了。”

　　“沒錯啊，”他說。

　　她說：“是這樣的，今天，我沒做什麼!”

　　：你又忘了

　　An 80-year-old couple were having problems remembering things, so they decided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothing was wrong with them.

　　After checking the couple out, the doctor told them they were physically okay but might want to start writing all the things down and make notes to help them remember things. The couple thanked the doctor and left .

　　Later that night while watching TV, the old man got up from his chair and his wife asked, "where are you going?" he replied, "To the kitchen." she asked, "Will you get a bowl of ice cream?" He replied, "Sure." She then asked him, "Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?" He said "No, I can remember that." She then said, "Well, I also would like some strawberries on top. You had better write that down because I know you'll forget that." He said, "I can remember that, you want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries." She replied, "Well, I also would like whip cream on top, I know you will forget that so you'd better write it down." Withirritation in his voice, he said, "I don't need to write that down, I can remember that," He then fumed into the kitchen. After about 30 minutes he returned from the kitchen and handed her a plate of bacon and eggs. She stared at the plate for a moment and said, "You forget my toast."

　　一對八十歲的老夫婦記性不好，於是決定到醫生那裡檢查，擔心哪裡有什麼毛病。

　　醫生檢查完後告訴他們體檢正常，只是為了幫助記憶，他們可以把想做的事用筆記下來。老夫婦謝過醫生後就回家了。

　　晚上看著看著電視，老頭站起身來，老太太問：“你去哪兒啊?”老頭回答：“去廚房。”老太太接著問：“帶一盤冰激凌來，好嗎?”老頭說：“沒問題。”老太太說：“難道不用寫下來?這樣你就不會忘記了?”老頭說：“不用了，我記得住。”老太太又說：“那好，我還想在冰激凌上放點草莓。你最好記下來，我想你記不住的。”老頭回答：“忘不了，你要的是一盤草莓冰激凌。”老太太還說：“我還想在頂上再放點奶油，我知道你記不住，還是寫下來吧。”老頭有點兒煩了，說：“用不著寫，我能記住。”老頭氣憤地走進廚房。大概過了三十分鐘，老頭回來遞給老伴一盤燻肉和雞蛋。老太太盯著盤子看了一會兒說：“你忘了拿烤麵包。”