簡潔的英語笑話閱讀

　　笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆。與此同時,笑話也是人們反對極權和專制制度的有力武器。小編整理了簡短的英語笑話，歡迎閱讀!

　　簡短的英語笑話篇一

　　Down on the Farm

　　農場趣談

　　The farmer was painting the inside of his outhouse

　　一位農夫正在漆他茅房內的牆壁，

　　when he slipped on the seat and fell into the hole beneath.

　　一不小心由所坐的椅子上滑了一跤，跌落到下面的茅坑內。

　　"Fire! Fire! Fire!" he yelled.

　　“失火了!失火了!失火了!”他叫道。

　　Shortly, the fire department arrived and one of the firemen leaned down and asked the farmer,

　　不久消防隊趕來了，一位消防人員彎下身來問

　　"Where's the fire?"

　　“哪裡失火了呢?”

　　"There ain't no fire," said the farmer,

　　“事實上並未失火，”農夫說，“但若是我喊“大便喔!大便喔!”

　　"but would you have come if I'd yelled,

　　"你們會趕來嗎?"

　　" Shit! Shit! Shit ! ? "'

　　簡短的英語笑話篇二

　　A Satisfied Gustomer

　　一位心滿意足的客戶

　　A rough looking fellow strolled into the bank and walked up to the teller.

　　有一位相貌粗魯的傢伙走進銀行對櫃檯職員說:

　　"I wanna open a god-damned checking account. "

　　“我想開個***的活期存款賬戶。”

　　"CertainLy, sir," replied the young lady, “but there's no need to use that kind of language."

　　“當然可以啦，先生，”年輕的小姐回答說，“但沒有必要使用那種字眼。”

　　"Hey, get your ass in gear, will ya? I’m in a hurry. ',

　　“嘿，***的能不能快一點嗎?我在趕時間呢!”

　　"Sir, I’m not used to being spoken to in that way. "

　　“先生，我不習慣別人那樣子對我說話。”

　　"I wanna open a fucking checking account, and I want to do it now, understand?"

　　“我要開一個x××的活期存款賬戶，而且要現在就辦，懂了嗎?”

　　"Sir, I'm going to get the manager," said the indignant young lady.

　　“先生，我去找經理來。”氣憤的年輕小姐說著。

　　Soon she returned with the manager, a dignified white haired gentleman, who asked, "What seems to be the trouble, sir?"

　　不久她帶了經理回來，那位滿頭白髮、看起來很莊嚴的老先生問道：“先生，到底有什麼問題嗎? ’

　　“I just won $10,000,000 in the lottery, and I want to open a goddamn checking account. "

　　“我剛中彩券得了一千萬美元，我想開個***的活期存款賬戶。”

　　"I see," said the manager warmly. "And this bitch is giving you trouble?"

　　“我知道了，”經理說道，“而這個臭婊子在給您添麻煩，是吧?

　　簡短的英語笑話篇三

　　We're in the Same Boat

　　同病相憐

　　The young man was terribly self-conscious because he had a wooden eye.

　　一位年輕人因為他有隻木製的眼睛而感到非常自卑。

　　His friends would often invite him to dance parties,

　　他的朋友常會邀請他參加舞會，

　　but he could never work up the courage to ask a girl to dance.

　　但他從沒能鼓起勇氣邀請女孩子跳舞。

　　But then, one evening, he spotted a girl With a wooden leg sitting sadly by herself.

　　有一晚，他卻不經意看見一位裝了一隻木製義肢的女孩獨自傷心地坐在角落。

　　Apprehensively, he walked up to her and asked,

　　他很謹慎地走向她問道：

　　"Would you like to dance?"

　　“你要不要跳舞呀?”

　　"Would I? ! " she exclaimed.

　　“我要不要? ”她驚叫。

　　"Oh, yeah? Well, you've got a wooden leg!"

　　“哦，怎麼了?你有一隻木製的義肢 ***而我有一隻木製的假眼，咱們應是天生的一對嘛!***。”