簡單的短篇英語笑話

　　在維吾爾民間文學以及整個維吾爾社會生活中，笑話作為重要的娛樂形式之一，佔據著重要的舉足輕重的地位。下面是小編帶來的，歡迎閱讀!

　　精選

　　enior Class

　　During the doctor's periodic visit to my elderly mother, I told him that Mother would be celebrating her 98th birthday in few days. Delighted by the news, he bent down and gave her a kiss for the occasion. He then announced that he, too, would be celebrating a birthday in few days and asked for a kiss in return.

　　When he left, my mother shook her head in disgust. "Can you imagine, " she said. "Seventy dollars and I had to kiss him too!"

　　Notes:

　　1 periodic adj.定期的

　　2 bend down彎腰

　　Exercises:

　　根據短文判斷下列句子正T、F：

　　① The doctor came to see the elderly woman regularly.

　　② The elderly woman would be celebrating her 99th birthday.

　　③ The doctor was surprised at the news.

　　④ The elderly woman and the doctor would celebrate their birthday on the same day.

　　⑤ The elderly woman thought the doctor was too mean.

　　根據短文判斷下列句子正T、誤F：

　　70.年長者階層

　　醫生按期來探視我的老母。我告訴他母親不幾天就要慶祝她98歲的生日了。醫生聽了也很高興，為此，他彎下腰來親了她一下。然後他說不幾天他也要慶祝自己的生日，並要求她還他一個吻。

　　醫生走後，我母親厭惡地搖搖頭。“你能想象嗎，”她說，“付了他70元，我還得親他!”

　　練習參考答案：

　　①T②F③F④F⑤T

　　閱讀

　　The Young Man at the Wheel

　　My infant daughter began crying as I drove home from the store, and since she was harnessed to her safety seat in the back, I couldn't console her. Stopping for a red light, I turned around and waved my hands, calling her name to distract her. I gave her my biggest smile and blew her a kiss. The sound of a horn from the car behind us prompted me to look up. The young man at the wheel was smiling broadly .He waved and then blew me a kiss.

　　Notes:

　　1 harness tov.繫於;綁於He is harnessed to his job. 他工作脫不開身。

　　2 console v.給予安慰或同情

　　3 distract v.轉移注意力;使分心

　　4 prompt v.驅使

　　5 the man at the wheel駕駛員

　　6 broadly adv.咧嘴地

　　Exercises:

　　根據短文填空：

　　① My infant daughter began_____ as I drove home from the store.

　　② And since she was harnessed_____ her safety seat in the back, I couldn't console her.

　　③ Stopping _____a red light, I turned around and waved my hands, calling her name to distract her.

　　④ I gave her my biggest smile and her a kiss.

　　⑤ The young man _____the wheel was smiling broadly.

　　71.駕車的小夥子

　　從商場開車回家的路上，我的小寶貝女兒開始哭鬧起來。由於她被套在後面的安全座裡，所以我無法安慰她。紅燈停車的時候，我轉過身來，對她擺手，叫她的名字來引她。我給她以滿臉笑容，並給她一個飛吻。從我們車後傳來的喇叭聲立刻使我抬頭望去。駕車的小夥子正對我咧著大嘴笑。他向我擺手並給了我一個飛吻。

　　練習參考答案：

　　① crying ② to ③ for ④ blew ⑤ at

　　學習

　　What Went Wrong

　　A Japanese company and an American company had a boat race, the Japanese won by a mile. The Americans hired analysts to figure out what went wrong. They reported that the Japanese had one person managing and seven rowing, while the Americans had seven managing and only one rowing. The American company immediately restructured its team. Now they had one senior manager, six management consultants and one rower.

　　In the rematch the Japanese won by two miles. So the American company fired the rower.

　　Notes:

　　1 analyst n.分析家

　　2 figure out 想出;演算出

　　3 restructure v.重組

　　4 consultant n.顧問

　　Exercises:

　　根據短文判斷下列句子正T、F：

　　① For the first time in the boat race, the Japanese won by two miles.

　　② The American company hired Japanese analysts to find out what went wrong.

　　③ The Japanese team had two persons managing and five rowing.

　　④ In the rematch the Japanese won by one mile.

　　⑤ The American company fired the rower.

　　72.問題出在哪裡

　　一家日本公司和一家美國公司進行了一場划船比賽。日本隊贏了一英里。美國人便請來了分析家探討問題出在哪裡。他們的報告說日本隊有一人掌舵七人划槳，而美國隊是七人掌舵一人划槳。美國公司立刻對隊伍進行了重組。這次他們有一個高階舵手、六個舵手顧問、一個划槳員。

　　在第二次比賽中，日本隊贏了兩英里。因此，美國公司解僱了划槳員。

　　練習參考答案：

　　①F②F③F④F⑤T