英語小笑話大全爆笑版

　　經常看看笑話,不僅能放鬆、舒緩我們緊張的心靈,也能培養我們活潑、開朗的性格和機智、大度的品質,更能受益於我們的學習。下面是小編帶來的爆笑版英語小笑話，歡迎閱讀!

　　爆笑版英語小笑話篇一

　　我沒有蛀牙 I have No Cavities

　　A smiling boy arrived home from a dental visit,"Hey mom,the dentist says I have no cavities. "

　　His mom stared at him wide-eyed and quite surprised,"It’s impossible --you never brush your teeth after cleaning the chocolate box before you go to bed!

　　Then the boy opened his mouth --he had not a tooth left!

　　小男孩兒看完牙醫，面帶微笑地回到家：“嘿，媽媽，牙醫說，我一顆蛀牙也沒有。”

　　媽媽驚訝地瞪大眼睛：“不可能——你每回上床睡覺前都把巧克力盒子裡的糖一下子吃完，而且從來不刷牙!”

　　這時，男孩兒張開了嘴巴——他的牙全被拔光了。?

　　爆笑版英語小笑話篇二

　　相親 A blind date

　　After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date.

　　和相親物件呆了一晚上後，男人再也受不了了。

　　Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave.

　　他事先安排了個朋友給他打電話，這樣他就能借故先離開了。

　　When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died."

　　當他回到桌邊，他垂下眼睛，裝出一副陰沉的表情，說：“有個不幸的訊息，我的祖父剛剛去世了。”

　　"Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"

　　“謝天謝地!”他的約會物件說，“如果你的祖父不死，我的祖父就得死了!”

　　爆笑版英語小笑話篇三

　　其餘的事由我負責 I'll See to the Rest

　　A guard was about to signal his train to start when he saw an attractive girl standing on the platform by an open door, talking to another pretty girl inside the carriage.

　　一位車上的列車員剛發出訊號讓火車啟動，這時他看見一位很漂亮的姑娘站在站臺上一節開啟的車廂門旁邊，跟車廂裡另一位漂亮姑娘在說話。

　　"Come on, miss!" he shouted. "Shut the door, please!"

　　“快點，小姐!”他喊道：“請把門關上。”

　　"Oh, I just want to kiss my sister goodbye," she called back.

　　“噢，我還沒有和妹妹吻別呢。”她回答道。

　　"You just shut that door, please," called the guard, "and I'll see to the rest."

　　“請把門關上好了，”列車員說：“其餘的事由我負責。”

　　爆笑版英語小笑話篇四

　　小心有狗!
        Beware of Dog!As a stranger entered a little country store, he noticed a sign warning, "Danger! Beware of dog!" posted on the glass door. Inside, he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor beside the cash register. "Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?" he asked the owner. "Yep, that's him," came the reply. The stranger couldn't help but be amused. "That certainly doesn't look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?" "Because," the owner explained, "Before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him!"

　　一名陌生人走進一家鄉間小商店，看到玻璃門上帖著的一個告示牌上寫著，“危險! 小心有狗!” 進去後，他看到一條樣子一點都不凶的老狗趴在收款機旁邊的地板上睡覺。 “這就是大夥都得留神的那隻狗啊?” 陌生人問店主。“是，就是他”，店主回答。 聽到這個回答， 陌生人覺得很好笑。“我覺得那條狗一點都不可怕。 你帖那個告示做什麼?” “因為，” 店主解釋說，“在我帖告示之前， 大夥老被他絆倒。”

　　爆笑版英語小笑話篇五

　　你太晚了You Are Too Late

　　On the bus a man discovered a pickpocket's hand thrust into his pocket.

　　"sorry," he said to the pickpocket, "you are too late. My wife did it before you."

　　在公共汽車上一人發現一個小偷把手伸到了他的口袋裡。

　　“對不起，”他對小偷說，“你太晚了，我妻子在你之前就做過同樣的事情了。”