英語幽默笑話集錦
下面是小編整理的,歡迎大家閱讀!
及翻譯一:
The poor husband"You can't imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with my wife," the man complained to his friend. "She asks me a question, then answers it herself, and after that she explained to me for half an hour why my answer is wrong.
及翻譯二:
When a man called a motel and asked how much they charged for a room, the clerk told him that the rates depend on room size and number of people.
" Do you take children?" the man asked.
"No, sir," replied the clerk. "Only cash and credit cards."
及翻譯三:
A smart housewife was told that there was a kind of stove which would only consume half of the coal she was burning. She was very excited, and said: "That'll be terrific! Since one stove can save half of the coal, if I buy two, no coal will be needed!"
When they're together, my five-year-old son and his cousin tend to cause mayhem. one Saturday, I put my foot down. "All right, you two," I said sternly. "No screaming , grabbing, whining, hitting, teasing, tattling, breaking toys, scratching or fighting."
As I turned to leave, I heard my son say, "C'mon, Steven, let's get dirty . "
我五歲的兒子和他的表弟在一起的時候,總要招來大亂。一個星期六,我開始抗議了。“好啦,你們兩個,”我嚴厲地說,“不許叫喊,不許亂拿,不許哭鬧,不許亂敲,不許取笑,不許扯淡,不許弄壞玩具,不許亂抓,不許打架。” 我剛轉身要走,就聽我兒子說:“來,斯蒂文,我們來把自己弄髒吧。”
四:
What a big deal A young businessman had just started his business, and rented a beautiful office. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear busy, the businessman picked up the phone and pretended that he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments. Finally, he hung up and asked the visitor. "Can I help you?" The man said, "Sure. I've come to install the phone."
我是來裝電話的一個年輕人剛剛開始做生意,就租了一個漂亮的辦公室。一天,他坐在辦公室裡,看到有一個人在外面,於是他就裝作生意很忙的樣子,拿起電話胡吹亂侃,還不停的甩出幾個大數字,好像在談一筆大買賣。到了最後,他終於掛了電話,問來訪的人,“有事兒嘛?”那個人回答,“我是來給你安裝電話的。”
五:
Mike was late for school. He said to his teacher, Mr. Black, "Excuse me for my coming late, sir. I watched a football match in my dream."
"Why did it make you late?" inquired the teacher.
"Because neither team could win the game, so it lasted a long time." replied Mike.
麥克上學遲到了。他對布萊克老師說:“對不起,老師,今天早上我遲到了。因為我在夢裡觀一場球賽。”
“為什麼它會讓你遲到呢?”老師問道。
“因為這兩個隊都沒有能力獲勝,所以就持續的時間長了。”麥克回答說。
幽默英語小笑話