有關爆笑英文小笑話閱讀

General 更新 2024年11月25日

  笑話作為一種城市化的民間口頭創作體裁,是一種重要的交際手段。笑話可能只是文字遊戲,但有時它在人們解決生活中的困惑時起著重要作用。小編精心收集了有關爆笑英文小笑話,供大家欣賞學習!

  有關爆笑英文小笑話:Blonde Deodorant

  A blonde walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist for a bottom deodorant. "Sorry, we don't sell bottom deodorant" the pharmacist replies, struggling to keep from laughing.

  "But I always buy it here", the blonde says. "I bought one last month". Thinking quickly, the pharmacist suggests, " I don't know what you bought before, may be you can bring in the empty container next time". "Sure", the blonde replies. "I'll bring it with me tomorrow"

  The next day, the blonde walks into the shop again and hands the pharmacist an almost empty deodorant stick. "This is just a normal deodorant", the pharmacist tells the blonde, "You use it under your arms".

  "No, it is not", the blonde answers, "it says so here: To apply, push up bottom".

  有關爆笑英文小笑話:Helicopter Lessons

  A blonde received a certificate for helicopter flying lessons for her birthday. One day she was bored and decided to take advantage of the opportunity.

  When she arrived at the place, the man said "Well, there's only one helicopter here, and it only has one seat, if I show you how to do it, do you mind going up solo?"

  "Oh of course! I can handle it" the blonde replied.

  Well, he showed her the inner-workings of the helicopter and sent her on her way, only asking that she radio in every 400ft. just to make sure everything was going smoothly.

  at 400ft, she radioed in saying "wow! this is so much fun!"

  At 800 ft. She radioed in again saying "this is pretty easy, I can do this all day!"

  At 1200 ft. She didnt. he waited and waited, and didn't hear from the blonde! seconds later he heard a crash in the field next to the station. He ran out to see what happened, the blonde crashed!

  Luckily she survived, "what happened?" he exclaimed.

  "Well, I was doing fine, but, I started to get cold, so I just turned off the big fan!"

  有關爆笑英文小笑話:Fire Escape

  A Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde escape a burning building by climbing to the roof. Firemen are on the street below, holding a blanket for them to jump in.

  The firemen yell to the Brunette, "Jump! Jump! It's your only chance to survive!" The Brunette jumps and SWISH! The firemen yank the blanket away...the Brunette slams into the sidewalk like a tomato.

  "C'mon! Jump! You gotta jump!' say the firemen to the Redhead.

  "Oh no! You're gonna pull the blanket away!" says the Redhead.

  "No! It's Brunettes we can't stand! We're OK with Redheads!"

  "OK" says the Redhead, and she jumps. SWISH! The firemen yank the blanket away, and the lady is flattened on the pavement like a pancake.

  Finally, the Blonde steps to the edge of the roof. Again, the firemen yell "Jump! You have to jump!"

  "No way! You're just gonna pull the blanket away!" yelled the Blonde.

  "No! Really! You have to jump! We won't pull the blanket away!"

  "Look," the Blonde says. "Nothing you say is gonna convince me that you're not gonna pull the blanket away! So what I want you to do is put the blanket down, and back away from it...."

  有關爆笑英文小笑話:Blonde No An Airplane

  This guy goes to sit at his plane seat in first class, and finds a blonde there. He says, excuse me miss, but this is my seat. She replies, I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I have a great body and I'm going to Florida. So the guy calls the stewardess over to help him.

  He explains the situation to the stewardess, and the stewardess says, miss, your seat is in coach, I'm gonna have to ask you to leave first class. The blonde response, I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I have a great body, and I'm going to Florida.

  The stewardess then goes to get the captain to help her, and the captain asks the blonde to please leave first class, and go back to coach. The blonde response, I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I have a great body, and I'm going to Florida. The captain thinks about this for a minute, then whispers something in the blondes ear. As soon as he does, she gets up and goes back to coach..

  The stewardess is amazed. What did you say? The captain replies, I told her first class doesn't go to Florida.

  有關爆笑英文小笑話:Blone Kidnapping

  There was a blonde woman who was having financial troubles, so she decided to kidnap a child and demand a ransom. She went to a local park, grabbed a little boy, took him behind a tree and wrote this note:

  I have kidnapped your child. Leave $10,000 in a plain brown bag

  behind the big oak tree in the park tomorrow by 7 AM.

  Signed - "The Blonde"

  She pinned the note inside the boy's jacket and told him to go straight home.

  The next morning, she returned to the park to find the $10,000 in

  a brown bag, behind the big oak tree, just as she had instructed. Also

  inside the bag was the following note:

  "Here is your money. I cannot believe that one blonde would do

  this to another."

  

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