關於搞笑的英語笑話短文

　　日常生活中，語言是人們相互交流的基本工具，因此，很大一部分幽默效果都反映在語言層面上，笑話是幽默的語言表達。小編精心收集了，供大家欣賞學習!

　　篇1

　　貼郵票

　　A lady employed a maid-servant being very stupid.

　　She asked her to send a letter, saying: "Go posting this letter, Betty, on which the stamp was already placed, I'm afraid the letter will be overweight. If it is, place the other penny stamp on it."

　　Ten minutes later, Betty returned. The hostess asked her, "Did you post my letter?"

　　"Yes , I did, Madam."answered Betty.

　　"I hope you didn't place another stamp on the letter that it would not cover up the address."

　　"Oh, no, madam, I didn't I placed the second stamp just on the first stamp."said Betty.

　　一位太太僱了一個愚蠢的女僕.

　　一次她對女僕說:"貝蒂,把這封信寄掉,信封上已經貼了郵票,但我怕信超重.如果真超重,你把另一張一便士的郵票貼上去."

　　十分鐘後,貝蒂回來了.女主人問她:"你把我的信寄了嗎?"

　　貝蒂回答說:"寄了,太太."

　　"我希望你沒有在貼另一張郵票時蓋住了信封上的地址."

　　"喔!不,太太,我把第二枚郵票貼在第一枚的上面了."貝蒂說

　　篇2

　　An American, a Scot and a Canadian were killed in a car accident.

　　They arrived at the gates of heaven,

　　where a flustered St. Peter explained that there had been a mistake.

　　"Give me $500 each,"

　　he said, "and I'll return you to earth as if the whole thing never happened."

　　"Done!" said the American.

　　Instantly, he found himself standing unhurt near the scene.

　　"Where are the others?" asked a medic.

　　"Last I knew," said the American, "the Scot was haggling price,

　　and the Canadian was arguing that his government should pay."

　　【譯文】

　　一位美國人，一位英格蘭人和一位加拿大人在一場車禍中喪生。

　　他們到達天堂的門口。在那裡，醉醺醺的聖彼德解釋說是搞錯了。

　　“每人給我五百美元，”

　　他說，“我將把你們送回人間，就象什麼都沒有發生過一樣。”

　　“成交!”美國人說。立刻，他發現自己毫不損傷地站在現場附近。

　　“其他人在哪兒?”一名醫生問道。 “我離開之前，”

　　那名美國人說，“我看見英格蘭人正在砍價，

　　而那名加拿大人正在分辯說應該由他的政府來出這筆錢。”

　　篇3

　　"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?" "No, sir, but you said

　　yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I am trying

　　to stop it."

　　"孩子，你為什麼用棉花塞住耳朵?它感染了嗎?"

　　"沒有，老師。可是你昨天說你告訴我的知識都是一個耳朵裡進，一個耳朵裡出，所以我要把它堵在裡面。"

　　篇4

　　A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas.

　　After hearing about this extravagant gift, a friend of his said, "I thought she wanted one of those sporty four-wheel-drive vehicles."

　　"She did," he replied. "But where was I going to find a fake Jeep?"

　　聖誕節來了，一位先生給他太太送的聖誕禮物是一個非常漂亮的鑽石戒子。

　　他朋友聽到他買這麼奢侈的禮物後，說到：“她不是想要輛四驅車嗎”。

　　先生答：“是啊，***可以買到假鑽石***，可去哪裡能買一輛假吉普車呢?”

　　篇5

　　A daughter came home and asked, "Daddy, can you write in the dark?"

　　Her father said, "I think so; what do you want me to write?"

　　"Oh, just your name on this report card!"

　　【譯文】

　　一個小女孩回家以後問爸爸說：“您可以在黑暗中寫字嗎?”

　　爸爸回答：“應該可以。你要我寫什麼?”

　　“喔，只要在這張成績單上簽名就行了!”