很好笑的簡單英語笑話

　　笑話一般指短小、滑稽的故事,是一種民間口頭創作形式,在民間文化中以口口相傳的形式傳播。下面是小編整理的，歡迎閱讀!

　　篇一

　　小的那個不就是你想要的?

　　One day, Bill and Tom went to a restaurant for dinner. As soon as the waiter took out two steaks, Bill quickly picked out the bigger steak for himself.

　　一天，比爾和湯姆去餐館吃飯。當服務員端上兩份牛排時，比爾迅速地為自己拿了比較大的那塊。

　　Tom wasn't happy about that: "When are you going to learn to be polite?"

　　湯姆對此很不開心：“你什麼時候能學會禮貌?”

　　Bill: "If you had the chance to pick first, which one would you pick?"

　　比爾說：“如果讓你先拿，你會拿哪個?”

　　Tom: "The smaller piece, of course."

　　湯姆說：“當然是小的那個。”

　　Bill: "What are you whining about then? The smaller piece is what you want, right?"

　　比爾：“那你還抱怨什麼?小的那個不就是你想要的，不是嗎?”

　　篇二

　　偷走啤酒的猴子

　　A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He takes his first sip and sets it down. While he is looking around the bar, a monkey swings down and steals the pint of beer from him before he is able to stop the monkey.

　　一男子去酒吧，點了一杯啤酒。他喝了一口放下。當他環視酒吧時，發現一隻猴子蕩下來，在他阻止之前，偷走了啤酒。

　　The man asks the barman who owns the monkey. The barman replies the piano player. The man walks over to the piano player and says "Do you know your monkey stole my beer." The pianist replies "No, but if you hum it, I'll play it."

　　該男子問酒吧招待，這隻猴子是誰的。服務員回答說是鋼琴手的。男子走到鋼琴手面前問：“你知道你的猴子偷了我的啤酒嗎?”鋼琴手回答說：“沒有，但是如果你能哼唱，我會為你演奏的。”

　　篇三

　　A young couple was becoming anxious about their four-year-old son, who had not yet talked. They took him to specialists, but the doctors found nothing wrong with him.

　　一對年輕的夫婦對於他們四歲的兒子仍然不會說話這件事非常著急。他們帶他去看專家，但是醫生們找不出任何不正常的地方。

　　Then one morning at breakfast the boy suddenly blurted, "Mom, the toast is burned."

　　之後有一天早上，這個男孩突然說道：“媽媽，麵包拷糊了。”

　　"You talked! You talked!" shouted his mother. "I'm so happy! But why has it taken this long."

　　“你說話了!你說話了!”他的媽媽嚷道。“我真高興!但是為什麼要我們等這麼長的時間呢?”

　　"Well, up till now," said the boy, "things have been okay."

　　“嗯，直到現在，”男孩說，“每件事都很正常啊。”

　　篇四

　　vacationing in hawaii, my husband and i went out to dinner one night at one of its finest restaurants - when presented with the check, my husband reached into his pocket for his wallet, but somehow lost his balance and fell over. as the people at the next table looked on in astonishment 'he said, "the food was delicious-but wait till you get your bill!"

　　在夏威夷度假時，一天晚上，丈夫和我去一家最好的飯店吃飯。當侍者拿來賬單結賬時，我丈夫把手伸進口袋掏錢包。但不知怎的，他失去了平衡，仰面摔倒了。在鄰桌的人還在驚訝地望著他的時候，他說：“飯菜味道是很美----但也要等結了賬再走呀。”

　　篇五

　　Vacationing on the island of Oahu, we were waiting in our tour bus for some stragglers to show up. A man, obviously not with our group, approached the bus and was about to board. How would our driver handle the situation, we wondered. Straight-faced, he leaned toward the door and asked, "Going to the nudist Colony, sir?"

　　在瓦湖島上度假時，我們坐在旅遊車裡等候掉隊的人。一位男子，明顯不是和我們一起的，朝旅遊車走來並要上車。司機會怎麼處理這種情況呢?我們都拭目以待。司機拉長了臉，向車門靠過去，問道：“先生，是去天體營嗎?”

　　"Oh, no," replied the would-be passenger, retreating quickly.

　　“哦，不，”剛想乘車的男子回答說，迅速轉身而逃。

　　"Works every time," the driver said with a wink.

　　“每次都管用，”司機眨巴了一下眼睛說。