超級搞笑的英語笑話欣賞

　　英語笑話是一種重要的交際手段,在人們的日常生活中起著重要作用，既能讓人放鬆身心，又能拉近彼此距離。本文是超級搞笑的英語笑話，希望對大家有幫助!

　　超級搞笑的英語笑話：This is marriage all about

　　My wife-to-be and I were at the county clerk's office for our marriage license. After recording the vital information — names, dates of birth, etc. — the clerk handed me our license and deadpanned, "No refunds, no exchanges, no warranties."

　　婚姻就是這麼一回事

　　我和未婚妻在縣辦公室領結婚證。在記錄完重要資訊——名字，出生日期，等後——辦事員遞給我結婚證，臉無表情地說，“不退錢，不包換，不保修。”

　　超級搞笑的英語笑話：承諾的結果

　　Father: I promised to buy you a car if you passed your examination, and you have failed. Whatwere you doing last term?

　　父親：我曾向你許諾，如果你考試及格就給你買倆小汽車，可你卻未能做到。你上學期一直在幹什麼呀?

　　Son: I was learning to drive a car.

　　兒子：我在學開汽車。

　　超級搞笑的英語笑話：你爸爸幫你做作業了嗎?

　　One day, Tim's mathematics teacher looked at his homework and saw that he had got all hissums right.

　　一天，蒂姆的數學老師看了他的作業，發現他全做對了。

　　The teacher was very pleased and rather surprised.

　　老師很高興，同時也十分驚訝。

　　He called Tim to his desk and said to him, "You got all your homework right this time, Tim. Whathappened? Did your father help you?"

　　他把蒂姆叫到桌前說："蒂姆，你這次的作業全都做對了，怎麼回事?你爸爸幫你做了嗎?"

　　"No, sir. He was too busy last night, so I had to do it all myself," said Tim."

　　"不，先生，我爸爸昨天很忙，我不得不全由自己做。"

　　超級搞笑的英語笑話：什麼都有,你要買什麼?

　　A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer. No, ma'am, we haven't had any for a while, and itdoesn't look as if we'll be getting soon.

　　一個商店經理聽見一個店員對顧客說：不，夫人，這會兒沒有，一時半會兒看來也不會有。

　　Horrified, the manager came runningover to the customer and said, Of course, we'll havesomesoon, we placed an order last week.

　　經理驚恐萬分地跑到顧客跟前說：當然，馬上就會有的。我們上週訂了貨。

　　Then the manager drew the clerk aside: Never, never, never say we are out of anything saywe've got it on order and it's coming.Now what was it she wanted?

　　然後經理把店員拉到一邊：千萬，千萬，千萬不要說我們沒有什麼，說我們已經訂了貨，貨馬上就到。現在你說她要買什麼?

　　Rain, said the clerk.

　　雨，店員說。

　　超級搞笑的英語笑話：好孩子 Good Boy!

　　Little Robert asked his mother for two cents.

　　小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。

　　"What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

　　“昨天給你的錢幹什麼了?”

　　"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

　　“我給了一個可憐的老太婆，”他回答說。

　　"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly.

　　“你真是個好孩子，”媽媽驕傲地說。

　　"Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

　　“再給你兩分錢。可你為什麼對那位老太太那麼感興趣呢?”

　　"She is the one who sells the candy."

　　“她是個賣糖果的。”