三年級短一點的好笑的英語笑話

　　笑話作為一種獨特的娛樂方式，它能夠幫助人們減輕壓力、放鬆心情、緩解疲勞，有利於身體健康。小編精心收集了，供大家欣賞學習!

　　篇1

　　The Evangelist

　　A middle aged couple is watching TV when a TV Evangelist***福音傳教士*** comes on and promises to heal the sick.

　　"If only you would pray with Him, place your right hand in the air, and place your left hand on theafflicted***折磨的*** area, the Almighty Lord will heal you."

　　So the man places his right hand in the air and his left hand on his crotch***胯部*** and his wife says "Gee honey he said heal the sick, not raise the dead!"

　　篇2

　　Making a Confession

　　A drunken man staggered into a Catholic church, sat down in the Confessional and said nothing. The priest is waiting and waiting and waiting.

　　The priest coughs to attract the drunk man's attention, but still the man says nothing.

　　The priest then knocks on the wall three times in a final attempt to get the man to speak.

　　Finally the drunk replies, "No use knockin,' pal. There's no paper."

　　篇3

　　Becoming Christian

　　A Jewish lawyer was troubled by the way his son turned out, and went to see his Rabbi about it. "I brought him up in the faith, gave him a very expensive bar mitzvah, cost me a fortune to educate him. Then he tells me last week he has decided to be a Christian. Rabbi... where did I go wrong?"

　　"Funny you should come to me," said the Rabbi. "Like you, I, too, brought my boy up in the faith, put him through University, cost me a fortune, then one day he comes and tells me he has decided to become a Christian."

　　"What did you do?" asked the lawyer. "I turned to God for the answer," replied the rabbi.

　　"And what did he say?"

　　He said, "Funny you should come to me..."

　　篇4

　　An Atheist

　　A young lady came home and told her Mother that her boyfriend had proposed but she had turned him down because she found out he was an atheist, and didn't believe in Heaven or Hell.

　　"Marry him anyway dear." the Mother said. "Between the two of us, we'll show him just how wrong he is."

　　篇5

　　How can I get into heaven 我怎麼才能上天堂

　　"If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the poor, would I get into heaven?" I asked the children in my Sunday school class.

　　"No!" the children all answered.

　　"If I cleaned the church everyday, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would I get into heaven?"

　　Again, the answer was, "No!"

　　"Well, " I continued, "then how can I get into heaven?"

　　A five-year-old boy shouted out, "You gotta be dead!"

　　“如果我把房子和車賣了，在車庫舉行義賣, 並把所有的錢給窮人，我能進天堂嗎?”我問主日學校的孩子。

　　孩子們齊聲回答：“不能!”

　　“那如果我每天都打掃教堂，給院子的草坪割草，並且把東西都收拾得乾淨整潔，我會上天堂嗎?”

　　回答還是：“不能!”“好吧， ”我繼續問, “那我要怎樣才能昇天堂呢?”

　　一個五歲的男孩兒叫道：“你得死了才行!”