有關簡單的英語笑話精選

　　冷笑話的主要應用群體是熟悉網路的平民、青年、學生、白領等,他們具備熟練的網路技能、很強的接受新事物的能力以及開拓創新的精神。小編分享有關簡單的英語笑話，希望可以幫助大家!

　　有關簡單的英語笑話：醫生，有人在我床底下Somebody under my bed

　　Jerry went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I've got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there's somebody under it. I'm going crazy!"

　　"Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I'll cure your fears."

　　"How much do you charge?"

　　"A hundred dollars per visit."

　　"I'll sleep on it," said Jerry.

　　Six months later the doctor met Jerry on the street. "Why didn't you ever come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist.

　　"For a hundred bucks a visit? The bartender cured me for $10."

　　"Is that so! How?"

　　"He told me to cut the legs off the bed! Ain't nobody under there now!!!"

　　有關簡單的英語笑話：Ice Fishing

　　A blonde who got a fishing rod for her birthday decided to go ice fishing to make good use of her gift.

　　Early the next morning, she got all her gear together and headed out to the ice.

　　When she reached her final destination, she cut a large hole in the ice and dipped the rod in.

　　Then suddenly she heard a voice that said, "There are no fish in there."

　　So she moves to another spot and cuts another hole, but then the same voice spoke again and told her there were no fish in there.

　　So she moves again, and the voice tells her there are no fish in there.

　　So she looks up and sees an irritated man staring down at her.

　　"How do you know there are no fish there?" asks the blonde.

　　So the man cooly says "Well first of all, this is a hockey rink, and second of all, you're going to have to pay for those holes."

　　有關簡單的英語笑話：In The Bag

　　A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde robbed a supermarket.

　　As they were stealing, a police officer walked in the store and saw what was happening.

　　He dashed toward them, but they were able to get away into the back of the store.

　　There, they found three sacks to hide in.

　　When the police officer checked there, he examined each sack.

　　He kicks the first bag, and the redhead says "meow" in a high voice.

　　The cop determines that it must only be a cat in that bag, and he moves on to the next.

　　When he kicks the second bag, the brunette says "woof" in a low voice.

　　The officer determines that it must only be a dog in that bag, so he moves on to the last bag.

　　He kicks the third bag, and the blonde shouts "potato" to the officer.

　　有關簡單的英語笑話：An Apple A Day...

　　A woman goes to the doctor for her yearly physical. The nurse starts with certain basic items.

　　"How much do you weigh?" she asks.

　　"115," she says.

　　The nurse puts her on the scale.

　　It turns out her weight is 140.

　　The nurse asks, "Your height?"

　　"5 foot 8," she says.

　　The nurse checks and sees that she only measures 5' 5".

　　She then takes her blood pressure.

　　And tells the woman it is very high.

　　"Of course it's high!" she screams: "When I came in here I was tall and slender! Now I'm short and fat!"

　　有關簡單的英語笑話：State Capitals

　　A dumb blonde was bragging about her knowledge of the state capitals of the United States.

　　She proudly announced, "Go ahead, ask me any of the capitals, I know all of them."

　　A redhead said, "O.K., what's the capital of Wyoming?"

　　The blonde replied, "Oh, that's easy, W."