關於英語冷笑話帶翻譯欣賞

　　笑話可以純粹是笑話，不帶任何攻擊的色彩。你可以內心企圖想要攻擊別人卻面帶微笑，這種微笑就變成是罪惡。小編精心收集了關於英語冷笑話帶翻譯，供大家欣賞學習!

　　關於英語冷笑話帶翻譯：You're Not Going to Make it

　　Gravely ill, a man went to the doctor with his wife. After the examination the physician motioned for the wife to meet him in the hallway.

　　"Your husband is very sick, " the doctor said, "but there are three things you can do to ensure his survival. First, fix him three healthful, delicious meals a day. Next, give him a stress-free environment , and don't complain about anything. Finally, make passionate love to him every day.

　　On the drive home the husband asked, "What did the doctor say?"

　　"I'm sorry, " she said, "but you're not going to make it."

　　一個人得了重病，妻子伴隨他去看醫生。檢查過後，醫生示意病人的妻子到走廊見他。

　　“你丈夫病得很重，”醫生說，“但有三件事可保住他的性命。第一，一日三餐，要營養美味。第二，給他一個輕鬆的環境，不要抱怨。第三，每天都對他傾注熾熱的愛。”

　　在驅車回家的路上，丈夫問道：“醫生說了什麼?”

　　“很遺憾，”妻子說，“你活不成了。”

　　關於英語冷笑話帶翻譯：不小心咬破了自己的舌頭

　　"Are we poisonous?" the young snake asked his mother.

　　“我們有毒嗎?”一個年幼的蛇問它的母親。

　　"Yes, dear," she replied - "Why do you ask?"

　　“是的，寶貝”，她回答說，“你問這個幹什麼?”

　　"Because I've just bitten my tongue! "

　　“因為我剛剛咬破自己的舌頭。”

　　關於英語冷笑話帶翻譯：Bilingual City

　　A patron in Montreal cafe turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded.

　　"This is an outrage," he complained. "The faucet marked C gave me boiling water."

　　"But, Monsieur, C stands for chaude — French for hot.

　　You should know that if you live in Montreal."

　　"Wait a minute," roared the patron. "The other tap is also marked C."

　　"Of course," said the manager, "It stands for cold. After all, Montreal is a bilingual city."

　　蒙特利爾咖啡館的一位顧客擰開盥洗室的水龍頭，結果被水燙傷了。

　　“這太可惡了，”他抱怨道，“標著C的龍頭流出的是開水。”

　　“可是，先生，C代表Chaude，在法語裡代表‘熱’。如果您住在蒙特利爾的話就應該知道這一點。”

　　“等等，”那位顧客咆哮著，“另外一個龍頭標的也是C。”

　　“那當然，”經理說道：“這個C代表冷***cold***。畢竟，蒙特利爾是個雙語城市。”

　　關於英語冷笑話帶翻譯：什麼都有,你要買什麼?

　　A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer. No, ma'am, we haven't had any for a while, and itdoesn't look as if we'll be getting soon.

　　Horrified, the manager came runningover to the customer and said, Of course, we'll havesomesoon, we placed an order last week.

　　Then the manager drew the clerk aside: Never, never, never say we are out of anything saywe've got it on order and it's coming.Now what was it she wanted?

　　Rain, said the clerk.

　　一個商店經理聽見一個店員對顧客說：不，夫人，這會兒沒有，一時半會兒看來也不會有。

　　經理驚恐萬分地跑到顧客跟前說：當然，馬上就會有的。我們上週訂了貨。

　　然後經理把店員拉到一邊：千萬，千萬，千萬不要說我們沒有什麼，說我們已經訂了貨，貨馬上就到。現在你說她要買什麼?

　　雨，店員說。