英語爆笑笑話帶翻譯

　　笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆。與此同時,笑話也是人們反對極權和專制制度的有力武器。小編精心收集了，供大家欣賞學習!

　　篇1

　　a man of actions

　　a crowd of student was gathered on the campus of oxford university. “you can have no doubt,” shouted a young man excitedly, “that if the dean does not take back what he said to me this morning, i’ll leave oxford this very evening!”

　　a buzzing noise followed. “what a man of actions!” one said in admiration. “how should we support him and learn from him!” said another.

　　suddenly, a girl asked, “what did the dean say to you, hob?”

　　he bent and whispered to her, “well,er???er???miss rose, er???he told me to get clean away from oxford this very evening!”

　　一個言出必行的人

　　一群學生聚在牛津的校園裡，一個年輕人情緒激動地叫道：“毋庸置疑，如果那個傢伙不收回他今早對我說的話，我今晚就離開牛津。”

　　下面一片喧譁。“真是個言出必行的人。”一個人豔羨地說。另一個說：“我們要支援他、學習他。”

　　突然，一個女孩問道：“那傢伙對你說什麼了，霍波?”

　　他彎下腰小聲說：“哦，呃…呃…，羅斯小姐，呃…他說要我今晚從牛津滾出去。”

　　篇2

　　quick cleanup 快速清掃

　　unexpected guests were on the way, and my mother, an impeccable housekeeper, rushed around straightening up. she put my father and brother to work cleaning the guest bathroom. later, when she went to inspect it, she was surprised that the once-cluttered room had been tidied up so quickly. then she saw the note on the closed shower curtains. it read "thank you for not looking in the bathtub."

　　不速之客就在路上，我媽媽，一個完美的家庭主婦，正忙裡忙外地整理。她分配給我爸和我哥哥的任務是打掃供客人使用的浴室。一會兒之後，當她去檢查的時候，她吃驚了，曾經一度雜亂的房間瞬間就被打掃乾淨了。接著她看到浴簾上有一張紙條，紙條上寫著：“謝謝你沒往浴缸裡看。”

　　篇3

　　how do i get the gum out我怎麼把口香糖取出來

　　distributing chewing gum to the passengers, the stewardess explained it was to keep their ears from popping. when the plane landed, one of the passengers rushed up to her and said, "i'm meeting my wife right away. how do i get the gum out from my ears?"

　　當空中小姐給乘客們發口香糖的時候，她解釋說口香糖有助於他們防止耳鳴。飛機著陸後，一位乘客跑到這位空中小姐面前，說道：“ 我馬上就要見到我妻子了。我怎麼才能把口香糖從耳朵裡面取出來呢?”

　　篇4

　　goldfish 金魚

　　stan: i won 92 goldfish.

　　斯丹：我贏了 92 條金魚。

　　fred: where are you going to keep them?

　　弗雷德：你想在哪兒養它們?

　　stan: in the bathroom.

　　斯丹：浴室。

　　fred: but what will you do when you want to take a bath?

　　弗雷德：但是你想洗澡時怎麼辦?

　　stan: blindfold***矇眼睛*** them!

　　斯丹：矇住它們的眼睛!