經典的簡單的英語小笑話

　　俄語笑話的語義、語用和語形結構表現為不同的型別。下面是小編帶來的簡單的英語小笑話，歡迎閱讀!

　　簡單的英語小笑話大全

　　***一***

　　兒子的大腦袋 Big Head

　　"All the kids make fun of me," the boy cried to his mother, "They say I have a big head."

　　“所有的孩子都拿我開玩笑，”小男孩哭著跟媽媽說：“他們說我長了一個大腦袋。”

　　"Don't listen to them," his mother comforted him, "You have a beautiful head. Now stop cryingand go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes."

　　“別聽他們的，”他媽媽安慰說：“你的腦袋長得很漂亮。好了，別哭了，去商店買10磅土豆來。”

　　"Where's the shopping bag?"

　　“購物袋在哪?”

　　"I haven't got one, use your hat."

　　“我沒有購物袋，就用你的帽子吧。”

　　***二***

　　良好的心願 Good wishes

　　One day a boy came to his teacher and said: Teacher, pa wants to know if you like roast pig.Icertainly do, said the teacher, and you tell your father he is very kind to think of me.Dayspassed, and nothing more was said about the roast pig.

　　一天有個男孩去對他老師說：老師，我爸想知道你是不是愛吃烤豬肉。當然囉，老師說，去告訴你父親，多謝他想著我。好幾天過去了，再沒提起烤豬肉的事兒。

　　Finally the teacher said to the boy: I thought your father was going to send me over someroast pig.Yes, said the boy, he did intend to, but the pig got well.

　　最後老師對男孩說：我以為你父親要給我送點烤豬肉來呢。是啊，孩子說，他是這麼想的，可後來豬又沒病了。

　　簡單的英語小笑話欣賞

　　***一***

　　睡覺是浪費還是節約 Waste or Save

　　Father: Oh, Jack, you have slept away the whole morning. Don't you know you are wastingtime?

　　父親：噢，傑克，你又睡了一上午。難道你不知道你這是在浪費時間嗎?

　　Jack: Yes, Dad. But I've saved you a meal, haven' I?

　　傑克：我知道，爸爸。可我還給您節省了一頓飯呢，是不是?

　　***二***

　　水分子式的新奇解釋 The formula for water

　　Teacher: What the chemical formula for water is the?

　　老師：水的分子式是什麼?

　　Blonde: HIJKLMNO!!

　　花瓶：HIJKLMNO!!

　　Teacher: What are you talking about?

　　老師：你在說什麼?

　　Blonde: Yesterday you said its H to O!

　　花瓶：昨天你不是說H to O嗎?

　　***一***

　　我飯後從不工作 I Never Work after Supper

　　A penny-pinching farmer didn’t want his hired hand to stop working. One morning, he told thefarmhand, “It’s such a nuisance to come in from the field, wash up for lunch and take time toeat. Why don’t we save time and eat lunch now?”

　　一位農場主非常吝嗇，不想讓他僱傭的幫手停下來休息。一天早上，他對幫手說：“從地裡回來，又要洗手吃飯，又花時間，真是太不方便了。我們何不省點時間，現在就吃午飯呢?”

　　The hired man agreed. The farm’s wife brought in some cold meat and fried potatoes, and thetwo men ate again.

　　僱員同意了。農場主的妻子端進來一些冷肉和油炸土豆。於是，兩個人又開始吃起來。

　　When they had finished, the cheap farmer said, “While we’re still at the table, let’s have suppertoo.”They were now served steak, boiled potatoes and mixed vegetables, and they ate oncemore.

　　吃完後，吝嗇鬼說：“既然我們還在桌子邊，讓我們連晚飯也吃了吧。”這次上桌的有排骨、煮土豆和雜燴青菜。於是兩個人又吃起來。

　　“Now that the meals are out of the way, ” the farmer announced, “we can go out and work allday without interruption. ”

　　“現在三頓飯都吃過了，”農場主宣稱道，“我們便可以出去一整天不停地幹活了。”

　　“Oh, no,” the farmhand answered. “I never work after supper.”

　　“哦，不，”那幫手回答說，“晚飯後我從不工作。”

　　***二***

　　商店競爭中的佼佼者

　　Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.

　　三個互相爭生意的商店老闆在一條商業街上租用了毗鄰的店鋪，旁觀者等著瞧好戲。

　　The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, Gigantic Sale! and Super Bargains!

　　右邊的零售商掛起了巨大的招牌，上書：大減價!特便宜!

　　The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, Prices Slashed! and Fantastic Discounts!

　　左邊的商店掛出了更大的招牌，聲稱：大砍價!大折扣!

　　The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, ENTRANCE.

　　中間的商人隨後準備了一個大招牌，上面只簡單地寫著：***處。