短小的爆笑英文笑話閱讀

　　在人們的日常生活及交往當中，笑話無處不在。它作為一個普遍現象，受到了不同領域學者的關注，研究涉及心理學、哲學、修辭學、社會學等眾多學科。下面是小編帶來的，歡迎閱讀!

　　篇一

　　Civil rights 公民權利

　　On the first day of an American history class, the professor assigned five chapters on civil rights.

　　The next day, he asked one of my classmates to name ten of those rights. When the student made no response, the professor said, "All right. Name five."

　　Still the student said nothing. Finally, the exasperated1 professor begged, "Just name one right you have as a civilian2."

　　To a room full of laughter, the young man replied, "I have the right to remain silent."

　　第一天上美國曆史課時，教授佈置學習第五章有關公民權的材料。

　　第二天，教授要求一個同學列舉其中十種權利。那位同學沒有回答，教授說：“好吧，說五種。”

　　那個同學還是一聲不吭，最後教授感到非常生氣，就要求他說：“請把你作為公民所擁有的權利列舉一種。”

　　面對鬨堂大笑，小夥子答道：“我有權利保持沉默。”

　　篇二

　　他遊不過大西洋

　　An American visiting Scotland met a shepherd with a beautiful sheep dog. The American offered the owner $50 for the dog ,but the shepherd refused. "I couldn't part with Jack1," he said.

　　Just then, a man with an English accent walked up and made the same offer. The shepherd agreed, pocketed money and handed over the dog.

　　The American was very angry. "You told me you wouldn't sell that dog," he cried .

　　"No ,no" said the shepherd. "I said I couldn't part with him. England is nit that far away and Jack will be back in a couple of days . But he couldn't swim the Atlantic".

　　一個訪問蘇格蘭的美國人碰到一個牧羊人帶著個漂亮的牧羊狗。美國人願出價50美元買這隻狗，可是牧羊人拒絕了。“我不能和傑克分離，”他說。

　　就在這時，一個英格蘭口音的人走過，出相同的價錢。牧羊人的同意了，他把錢裝起來，把狗遞過去。

　　美國人很生氣，“你告訴我你不願賣這隻狗的，”他大聲說。

　　“不，不”牧羊人說，“我說過我不能與他分離。英格蘭並不太遠，傑克幾天後就會回來。可是，它遊不過大西洋呀”。

　　篇三

　　A white lie 善意的謊言

　　A middle-aged1 couple went to the gallery.

　　The wife who was nearsighted, stood in front of a mirror at the entrance, which she thought that it was a picture, and she saw a woman's image2 and cried out, "Dear me, how could a woman be so ugly?"

　　"Don't be so fussy," said the husband. "It's lucky that it is not a mirror and it's a picture."

　　一對中年夫妻來到畫廊。

　　妻子是近視眼，她站到了***處的鏡子面前，她以為這面鏡子是一幅畫。她看到了一張女人的肖像，驚呼道：“天吶，天下竟然有這樣醜陋的女人。”

　　“別大驚小怪，”她的丈夫說，“還好那是一張畫，而不是一面鏡子。”

　　篇四

　　The Horse can talk 馬會說話

　　A man was reading1 a newspaper at a table, when his wife suddenly came to him and hit him on the back. The man was very surprised and asked: "Why do you hit me?"

　　The wife answered: "Who is Mary mentioned in the letter in your pocket?"

　　The man said: "It was the horse in the racecourse, which I chipped2 in two weeks ago."

　　Three days later, the man was sitting at the table, and this time his wife beat him angrily. The man asked: "What do you beat me for this time?"

　　The wife answered: "Your horse gave you a telephone call."

　　一個男人坐在桌邊看報紙，他妻子忽然走到身後，用拳頭狠狠地打他，男人摸著腦袋不解地問：“為什麼打我?”

　　妻子回答:”你的口袋裡那封信提到的瑪麗是誰?”

　　男人說：“是我兩星期前在馬場下注的那匹馬。”

　　三天後，男人又在桌邊，他妻子這次更氣憤地打他。男人問：“這次又為什麼?”

　　妻子回答：“你的馬打電話來了。”