英文簡短笑話欣賞

　　冷笑話是一種新興的語言現象,伴隨著網路的普及它已經滲透到了青年群體的日常生活,偶爾爆出的一兩句冷笑話能使交流氛圍變得輕鬆愉悅,也能展示交談者的幽默和智慧。小編整理了英文簡短笑話，歡迎閱讀!

　　英文簡短笑話篇一

　　Wow!That's a Big One!

　　哇!那個真是大得嚇人

　　One day a tourist walked into a Texas tavern and ordered a shot of whiskey. The bartender puta big tumbler full of whiskey in front of him.

　　某一天一位觀光客走進一家德州酒店點了一杯威士忌，酒保競給他一大杯的酒。

　　"What's this?" asked the tourist.

　　“這是什麼呢?”觀光客問道。

　　"Why, it's a shot of whiskey! Don't you know that everything is big in Texas?"

　　“怎麼了，那是你點的酒，難道你不知道德州每樣東西都大得嚇人。”

　　Then, an armadillo ran past the door.

　　那時剛好有一隻穿山甲跑過酒店門口。

　　“What was that?" asked the tourist.

　　“那是什麼東西?’觀光客又問。

　　"Why, that was a Texas cockroach. "

　　“哦，那是隻德州蟑螂!”

　　By this time, the whiskey had gone to the tourist's bladder as well as his head,

　　喝了酒，觀光客感到腹脹頭昏，

　　and he asked the location of the bathroom.

　　他問哪裡有洗手間。

　　The bartender directed him to go down the hall and to the right,

　　酒保告訴他下樓後右轉，

　　but the tourist turned left instead and fell into the swimming pool.

　　但觀光客卻向左轉，跌落在酒店的游泳池中。

　　The bartender heard the splash and went to investigate.

　　酒保聽到水聲跑出去看個究竟。

　　As he put his head in the door, he heard the tourist cry. "Don't flush the toilet ! "

　　剛把頭伸進門就聽到觀光客大叫，“不要按動馬桶沖水喲!

　　英文簡短笑話篇二

　　Aren't Kidss Wonderful?

　　小孩子實在了不起!

　　Mother got on the train with Little Johnny and Little Ronny.

　　媽媽和小強尼、小羅尼一起搭乘火車。

　　Little Johnny was full of questions, as usual: "What's an emergency brake, Mommy?"

　　小強尼一如往常問東問西，“媽咪，什麼是緊急煞車?"

　　“Why did that policeman ask to see our tickets?"

　　“為什麼那位警察叔叔要看我們的車票?"

　　"Why can't I lean out the window?" etc.

　　“為什麼身體不能伸出窗外?"等等諸如此類問題。

　　His mother was becoming ever more exasperated.

　　媽媽實在忍不住要發脾氣了。

　　Finally, Little Johnny asked, "What was that last station we stopped at, Mommy?"

　　最後小強尼又問：“媽咪，剛剛火車停靠的是哪一站?”

　　"I don't know, Johnny, and will you please stop pestering me? I'm trying to read."

　　“我不知道，強尼，你可不可以不要煩我，我正在看書呢!”

　　A few minutes of silence passed. Then Johnny said, "It's too bad you don't know what stationthat was, cause that's where Little Ronny got off."

　　一陣安靜後，強尼說：“真糟糕，你竟然不知道羅尼下車的哪個車站。"

　　英文簡短笑話篇三

　　Don't Get Caught!

　　不要被逮著了!

　　Out in the forest preserve, a man strolled up to the fisher man and asked whether he'd hadany luck.

　　在森林保護區內，有個人走向一位正在釣魚的老兄並問他有沒有收穫。

　　"No,nothing today,but you should see me yesterday. I caught fourteen bass in the morning andanother twelve in the afternoon!"

　　“今天什麼也沒有，不過你應該昨天來見我才是。昨天早上我釣了十四尾鱸魚，下午釣了十二尾呢!

　　"Well, that's very interesting. Do you know who I am?"

　　“哦，那相當不錯嘛，你知道我是誰嗎?”

　　"No."

　　“不知道。”

　　"I happen to be the game warden."

　　“我恰巧就是監視狩獵的管理員。”

　　"Oh.And do you know who I am? I'm the biggest liar you ever laid eyes on."

　　“哦，那你又知道我是誰嗎?我是你所發現最會說謊話的人。”