關於兩分鐘的英語笑話大全

　　英語笑話可能只是文字遊戲,但有時它在人們解決生活中的困惑時起著重要作用。小編整理了關於兩分鐘的英語笑話，歡迎閱讀!

　　關於兩分鐘的英語笑話：Blind Man in Texas

　　There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas.

　　When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said, "Wow, these seats are big!"

　　The person next to him answered, "Everything is big in Texas."

　　When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar.

　　Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands. He exclaimed, "Wow these mugs are big!"

　　The bartender replied, "Everything is big in Texas."

　　After a couple of beers, the blind man asked the bartender where the bathroom was located.

　　The bartender replied, "Second door to the right."

　　The blind man headed for the bathroom, but accidentally tripped over and skipped the second door.

　　Instead, he entered the third door, which lead to the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident. Scared to death, the blind man started shouting, "Don't flush, don't flush!"

　　關於兩分鐘的英語笑話：Akimbo ***叉腰***

　　Just like most of other kids, aged two Emilia didn' t like washing hands──she' s always wiping the dirt off hands on her clothes. One day I accompanied her to have fried cicadae***蟬***. Habitually she rubbed her grease fingers on her real silk short gown. I held back ***阻擋*** her from doing it: " What do you want to do?" She was immediately on to ***意識***her blame, replied at ease***從容***: " I' m akimbo."

　　像大多數別的小孩一樣，兩歲艾咪麗雅不愛洗手，吃東西弄髒手，隨便在身上一抹就得了。一天我正陪她吃炸知了，她手上的油多了，便習慣地往真絲小褂子上蹭，我阻止道：“你想幹什麼?”她馬上意識到問題所在，從容答道：“我叉腰。”

　　關於兩分鐘的英語笑話：Reason of Punishment

　　懲罰的原因

　　One day a little girl came home from school, and said to her mother, Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do.

　　The mother exclaimed, But that's terrible! I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this! By the way, what was it that you didn't do?

　　The little girl replied, My homework.

　　一天，小女孩從學校回到家裡，對媽媽說：媽媽，今天在學校裡我因為一件我沒有做的事情而受到懲罰。

　　媽媽激動地說：那真是太可怕了!我要跟你的老師好好談一談，對了，你沒有做過的那件事是什麼?

　　小女孩回答說：我的家庭作業

　　關於兩分鐘的英語笑話：Two Birds 兩隻鳥

　　Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

　　Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.

　　Teacher: Please tell us.

　　Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

　　老師： 這兒有兩隻鳥，一隻是麻雀。誰能指出哪隻是燕子，哪隻是麻雀嗎?

　　學生：我指不出，但我知道答案。

　　老師：請說說看。

　　學生：燕子旁邊的就是麻雀，麻雀旁邊的就是燕子。

　　關於兩分鐘的英語笑話：I'm Trying to Stop It

　　左耳朵進右耳朵出

　　"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?"

　　"No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other, so I am trying to stop it."

　　“孩子，你為什麼用棉花塞住耳朵?它感染了嗎?”

　　“沒有，老師。可是你昨天說你告訴我的知識都是一個耳朵裡進，一個耳朵裡出，所以我要把它堵在裡面。”