英語幽默趣味故事三則

　　“哪裡有人,哪裡就有笑聲。”從古到今，笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調劑品”。笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆，在人們的日常生活中起著重要調劑作用。下面小編為大家帶來，歡迎大家閱讀!

　　英語幽默趣味故事：倔強的馬

　　The great novelist had gone mad, but now there seemed to be some hope for his recovery. For six months, he had been sitting at his typewriter pounding out a novel. Finally, he pronounced it completed and brought the book to his psychiatrist, who eagerly began reading it aloud:

　　General Jackson leaped upon his faithful horse and yelled, 'Giddyap, giddyap, giddyap, giddyap' The doctor thumbed through the rest of the manuscript. There's nothing here but 500 pages of giddyaps! he exclaimed.

　　Stubborn horse, explained the writer.

　　大作家瘋了，但現在似乎還有恢復的希望。六個月以來，他都坐在打字機旁用力地敲一部小說。終於，他宣稱書已寫好並把它拿到精神病醫生那裡。醫生急切地大聲朗讀起來：

　　“傑克遜將軍跨上他的忠實的馬，喊道：‘駕，駕，駕，駕……’”醫生翻了翻剩下的手稿。“五百頁紙竟全是‘駕，駕’!”他驚奇地說。

　　“是匹倔強的馬，”作家解釋道。

　　英語幽默趣味故事：以命抵命

　　The English author, Richard Savage, was once living inLondon in great poverty. In order to earn a little money he hadwritten the story of his life, but not many copies of the bookhad been sold in the shops, and Savage was living from hand tomouth. As a result of his lack of food he became very ill, but after a time, owing to the skill of the doctor who had lookedafter him, he got well again.

　　After a week or two the doctorsent a bill to Savage for his visits, but poor Savage hadn't anymoney and couldn't pay it. The doctor waited for another month and sent the bill again. But still no money came. Afterseveral weeks he sent it to him again asking for his money. Inthe end he came to Savage's house and asked him for payment, saying to Savage, “You know you owe your life to me and Iexpected some gratitude from you.”

　　“I agree,” said Savage, “that I owe my life to you, and toprove to you that I am not ungrateful for your work I will givemy life to you.”

　　With these words he handed to him two volumes entitled,The life of Richard Savage.

　　英國作家理查德·薩維奇一度在倫敦過著貧困潦倒的生活，為了賺幾個錢，他曾寫了有關他自己生平的故事。但是這部書在書店裡並沒有賣出幾本，薩維奇過著朝不保夕的日子。由於缺乏食物，他病得很厲害。後來，由於給他治療的那個醫生的高明醫術，他才又恢復了健康。

　　過了一兩個星期之後，醫生給薩維奇送來了一張討要診費的帳單，但是貧窮的薩維奇沒有錢來償付。醫生等了一個月後又送來了帳單，但仍然未索回分文。幾個星期之後，他又送來帳單要錢。最後，醫生本人來到了薩維奇的家中，對他說：“你明白，你是欠我一條命的，我希望你有所報答。”

　　“是的，”薩維奇說，“我是欠你一條命，為了向你證明我對你的診治不是不報答，我將把我的命給你。”

　　說著這番話，薩維奇遞給醫生兩卷書，名叫《理查德·薩維奇的一生》。

　　英語幽默趣味故事：完美兒子

　　A:

　　I have the perfect son.

　　B:

　　Does he smoke?

　　A:

　　No, he doesn't.

　　B:

　　Does he drink whiskey?

　　A:

　　No, he doesn't.

　　B:

　　Does he ever come home late?

　　A:

　　No, he doesn't.

　　B:

　　I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?

　　A:

　　He will be six months old next Wednesday

　　A:

　　我有一個完美的兒子。

　　B:

　　他抽菸嗎?

　　A:

　　不，不抽。

　　B:

　　他喝威士忌嗎?

　　A:

　　不，他不喝。

　　B:

　　那他回家晚嗎?

　　A:

　　不，不會。

　　B:

　　我想你確實有一個完美的兒子。他多大了?

　　A:

　　下週三他就六個月大了。