關於經典的爆笑英語笑話

　　笑話由於其滑稽可笑的特點而為人們長久以來所喜愛。而人們對笑話的熱衷與喜愛也促使人們在開懷捧腹的同時對笑話為何能夠使人發笑這一問題進行思考。小編精心收集了，供大家欣賞學習!

　　：A bilingual city 雙語城市

　　A patron in Montreal cafe turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded. "This is an outrage," he complained. "The faucet marked C gave me boiling water.""But, Monsieur, C stands for chaude - French for hot. You should know that if you live in Montreal.""Wait a minute," roared the patron. "The other tap is also marked C.""Of course," said the manager, "It stands for cold. After all, Montreal is a bilingual city."

　　蒙特利爾咖啡館的一位顧客擰開盥洗室的水龍頭，結果被水燙傷了。“這太可惡了，”他抱怨道，“標著C的龍頭流出的是開水。”“可是，先生，C代表Chaude，在法語裡代表‘熱’。如果您住在蒙特利爾的話就應該知道這一點。”“等等，”那位顧客咆哮著，“另外一個龍頭標的也是C。”“那當然，”經理說道：“這個C代表冷。畢竟，蒙特利爾是個雙語城市。”

　　：This Way to Request 如是請求

　　I had fallen and dislocated my elbow, which made writing checks for my small business nearly impossible. I called my bank to explain that the signature on my checks would look odd due to my accident, and would they please horror them anyway.　　 "Okay," said the woman on the phone, "but you'll have to write a letter to the bank telling them that you are requesting this. " 我摔倒了，肘骨脫臼了。這使得我幾乎不能給我的小生意籤賬單了。我打電話給銀行解釋說由於事故，賬單上我的簽名看起來會有些古怪，並請求他們無論如何給予承兌。 　　 “好的，”電話中的女子說，“但你必須給銀行寫封信，告訴他們你在作此項請求。”

　　：$250 due for a consultation 諮詢費250美元

　　A lawyer's dog, running about unleashed, beelines for a butcher shop and steals a roast. Butcher goes to lawyer's office and asks, "If a dog running unleashed steals a piece of meat from my store, do I have a right to demand payment for the meat from the dog's owner?" The lawyer answers, "Absolutely." "Then you owe me $8.50. Your dog was loose and stole a roast from me today." The lawyer, without a word, writes the butcher a check for $8.50. Several days later, the butcher opens the mail and finds an envelope from the lawyer: $250 due for a consultation.

　　律師的狗，沒有拴而到處閒逛，它來到一家肉店，偷走了一塊 烤肉。店主來到律師的辦公室，問道“如果一條沒栓的狗從我的商店裡偷了塊肉，我有權利從狗的主人那裡要回損失嗎?律師答道：“完全可以”，“那你欠我 8.50美元，你的狗沒栓而且今天從我的店裡頭了塊肉”，律師什麼都沒說，馬上給他寫了一張支票。一些天后，店主開啟郵箱，發現一封來自律師的信，信上寫 道：諮詢費250美元。

　　：First-aid class 急救課

　　A man was telling friends how first-aid classes had prepared him for an emergency.

　　"I saw a woman hit by a car," he said, "She had a broken arm, a twisted knee and a skullfracture." "How horrible! What did you do?" "Thanks to my first-aid training I knew just how to handle it. I sat on the curband put my head between my knees to keep from fainting."

　　一個男子正在告訴朋友們急救課是如何讓他為突發事件做好準備的。

　　“我看見一個女人被車子撞了，“他說，“她手臂斷了，膝蓋彎曲，頭骨破裂。”“太可怕了!你做了些什麼?”“因為我上過急救培訓，我知道該怎麼處理這件事，我在路邊坐下來，把我的頭放在膝蓋上，以防止昏倒。”

　　：獻錯殷勤

　　At a dinner party a shy young man had been trying to think of something nice to say to his hostess. At last he saw his chance when she turned to him and remarked, "What a smallappetite you have tonight, Mr. Jones.""To sit next to you," he replied gallantly, "would cause any man to lose his appetite."

　　在一次晚餐聚會上，一位靦腆的年青人一直在冥思苦想對女主人說一些好聽的話。機會總於來了，女主人轉向他說：“瓊斯先生，您今晚的飯量太小了。”“坐在您身邊，”他殷勤的說道，“任何男人都會失去胃口的。”