初中英語笑話精選

　　適合初中學生閱讀的英語笑話都有哪些呢?下面小編為大家帶來，歡迎大家閱讀!

　　1：

　　A man dirning with a friend explained the peculiarities of the restaurant they were in:"The waiters never admit they don't have something. They'll take your order. for a slice of sun and too away as if they mean to get it...then they'll come back and say they just ran out.”

　　一位和朋友吃飯的男士解釋他們在飯館裡吃飯的怪現象時說:“服務員從未承認過他們沒有什麼萊。假如你想要一份太陽，他們也會拿著選單離去，好像真能給你弄來似的。然後，他們回來說這道菜剛賣完。”為了證明這一點，我說:“請來一份恐龍。”

　　To prove his point，he said to the waiter,“The dinosaur，please.”

　　“好的，先生，”服務員回答說:“您要的恐龍是做得嫩點還是老點兒的?”

　　“Yes，sir，“answered the waiter.”And how would you like it cooked?"

　　“老點兒的。”

　　"Well done!"

　　服務員離開了，又很快回來了。“對不起，先生，我們的恐龍菜剛賣完。”

　　The waiter left and returned quickly.“I'm sorry, sir，but we've just run out of a dinosaur.”

　　“什麼?”顧客氣憤地說:“沒有恐龍?”

　　" What?" said the diner with feigned disappointment."No dinosaur?"

　　那服務員低聲地說:“我們的確還剩一些。”他顯得作常自信的樣子。“但恐龍肉有點兒不太鮮了，所以我們還是不給您上這道菜的好。”

　　The waiter lowered his voice. "Well，we do have some left，“he whispered confidentially,"...but it's not very fresh and I won't serve it!”

　　2：

　　There was once a large，fat woman who had a small，thin husband. He had a job in a big company and was given his weekly wages every Friday evening. As soon as he got home on Fridays，his wife used to make hirn give her all his money，and then she used to give him back only enough to buy his lunch in the office every day.

　　曾有一位塊兒大、膘肥的女人，她的丈夫卻是瘦小、乾癟。丈夫是在一家大公司做事。每到週五晚上領到工資，也正是週五這位丈夫回家時，老婆就讓他把所有錢都交出來，然後再給他一點兒在辦公室吃午飯的錢。

　　One day the small man came home very excited. He hurried into the living-room. His wife was listening to the radio and eating chocolates.”You'll never guess what happened to me today，dear,"he said. He waited for a few seconds and then added:“I won ten thousand pounds on the lottery!”

　　一天，這位小丈夫回到家，興奮得不得了。他匆匆忙忙地來到起居室。他老婆正在那兒聽廣播，吃巧克力。“親愛的，你永遠也猜不到我今天怎麼了，”他說道，過了數秒鐘他又說:“我中了一萬英磅的彩票。”

　　"That's wonderful!"said his wife delightedly. But then she thought for a few seconds and added angrily，"But wait a moment! How could you afford to buy the ticket?".

　　“太棒了!”他老婆非常高興地說。但她又沉思了一會兒並氣憤地問:“你說說，你拿什麼錢買的彩票?”

　　3：

　　A 747 was halfway across the Atlantic when the captain got on the loud speaker:"Attention，passengers. We have lost one of our engines，but we can certainly reach London with the three we have left. Unfortunately， we will arrive an hour late as a result. "

　　一架747客機正跨越大西洋時，喇叭裡傳來了機長的聲音:“旅客們請注意，我們四個引擎之中有一個丟失了。但利下的三個引擎會把我們帶到倫敦的。不幸的是因此我們書晚到一小時。”

　　Shortly thereafter，the passengers heard the captain's voice again:"Guess what，folks. We just lost our third engine，but please be assured we can fly with only one. We will now arrive in London three hours late. "

　　過了一會兒，旅客們又聽到了機長的聲音:“各位，你們猜怎麼啦?”我們剛又掉了第三個引擎。但請你們相信好了，有一個引擎我們也能飛，但要晚三個小時了。”

　　At this point，one passenger became furious. "For Pete's sake,"he shouted，"If we lose another engine，we'll be up here all night !"

　　正在這時，一位乘客非常氣憤地說:“看在上帝的扮止，如果我們再掉一個引拿，我們會整夜都呆在天上了。”