關於很好笑的英語小笑話

　　笑話***анекдот***是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。透過笑話我們可以看到一個民族的生存環境、生活方式、社會關係和心理特徵等等。小編分享，希望可以幫助大家!

　　：我晚飯後從不工作

　　A penny-pinching farmer didn't want his hired hand to stop working. One morning, he told the farmhand, "It's such a nuisance to come in from the field,, wash up for lunch and take time to eat. Why don't we save time and eat lunch now?"

　　The hired man agreed. The farm's wife brought in some cold meat and fried potatoes, and the two men ate again.

　　When they had finished, the cheap farmer said, "While we're still at the table, let's have supper too. " They were now served steak, boiled potatoes and mixed vegetables, and they ate once more.

　　"Now that the meals are out of the way, " the farmer announced, we can go out and work all day without interruption. "

　　"Oh, no, " the farmhand answered. " I never work after supper.

　　一位農場主非常吝嗇，不想讓他僱傭的幫手停下來休息。一天早上，他對幫手說：“從地裡回來，又要洗手吃飯，又花時間，真是太不方便了。我們何不省點時間，現在就吃午飯呢?”

　　僱員同意了。農場主的妻子端進來一些冷肉和油炸土豆。於是，兩個人又開始吃起來。

　　吃完後，吝嗇鬼說：“既然我們還在桌子邊，讓我們連晚飯也吃了吧。”這次上桌的有排骨、煮土豆和雜燴青菜。於是兩個人又吃起來。

　　“現在三頓飯都吃過了，”農場主宣稱道，“我們便可以出去一整天不停地幹活了。”

　　“哦，不，”那幫手回答說，“晚飯後我從不工作。”

　　：I Want to Get Out

　　A bar owner locked up his place at 2 a. m. and went home to sleep. He had been in bed only afew minutes when the phone rang." What time do you open up in the morning ?" he heard anobviously inebriated man inquire.

　　The owner was so furious, he slammed down the receiver and went back to bed. A fewminutes later there was another call and he heard the same voice ask the same question. "Listen," the owner shouted ,"there's no sense in asking me what time I open because Iwouldn't let a person in your condition in..."

　　"I don't want to get in," the caller interjected. "I want to get out."

　　我要出去

　　在凌晨兩點，酒吧店主鎖了店門，回家睡覺。他剛躺下幾分鐘，這時電話響了。“你早上幾點營業?”他聽到一位明顯已醉醺醺的男子的聲音。

　　店主非常氣憤，砰地一聲掛上電話又上床去睡。幾分鐘後又有一個電話，他聽到還是那個聲音問同樣的問題。“聽著，”店主嚷道，“不要問我什麼時候營業，因為我不會讓你這種人進……”

　　“我不是想進來，”那人打斷他的話，“我要出去。”

　　：It Seemed Like Hours

　　As a band instructor at an elementary school, I require my students to turn in practice sheetssigned by their parents so I can be sure they are putting in enough time. I had to laugh,however, when one parent wrote on her child's sheet, "Practiced 17 minutes, but it seemed likehours.

　　猶如幾個時辰

　　作為一個小學的樂隊指揮，為了確保學生投入足夠的時間練習，我要求他們上交由他們父母簽字的練習單。可是有一次，一位家長的簽字把我逗樂了。練習單上寫著：“練習了17分鐘，但猶如幾個時辰。”