高中英語長笑話帶翻譯

　　笑話***анекдот***是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。透過笑話我們可以看到一個民族的生存環境、生活方式、社會關係和心理特徵等等。小編精心收集了，供大家欣賞學習!

　　篇1

　　A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "Butofficer," the man began, "I can explain." "Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to letyou cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back." "But, officer, I just wanted to say,..." "AndI said to keep quiet! You're going to jail!" A few hours later the officer looked in on hisprisoner and said, "Lucky for you that the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a goodmood when he gets back." "Don't count on it," answered the fellow in the cell. "I'm thegroom."

　　警察在小鎮上攔下了一個在主街上減速駕駛的人，“但是，警官，”那個男子說道：“我能解釋原因。”“閉嘴”，警察不耐煩地說道“我得把你關進牢房讓你坐冷板凳，直到警長回來。”但是，警官，我想說的是……”“我告訴過你讓你閉嘴。你得進監獄。”幾個小時後，警察來看那個被關押的男子，“你很幸運，警長去參加他女兒的婚禮了，他回來時心情會很好。”“不要提那件事了”被關押的男子說道：“我正是新郎”。

　　篇2

　　Applicant: "I'm looking for a job as a consultant."

　　Employer: "I'm sorry, we already have enough consultants."

　　Applicant: "That's okay, with my experience, I can be an adviser."

　　Employer: "More than we can use already."

　　Applicant ***getting desperate***: "I'm not proud. I can do paperwork, I'll be a clerk, If you have too many, I'll start as a janitor."

　　Employer: "It just doesn't seem that we have any openings for a person with your qualifications."

　　Applicant ***stands, angrily yells***: "To work for you I'd have to be a low life, bellycrawling, double dealing jerk!"

　　Employer: "Well, you didn't say you were an attorney! Have a seat, we may have an opening."

　　篇3

　　An old man lived alone in Northern Ireland. His only son was in prison. The old man wanted toplant some potatoes in his garden but he didn't know anyone who would help him plow up thegarden. He wrote to his son about it, and received this reply, For HEAVENS SAKE, don't dig upthat garden, that's where I buried the GUNS!

　　一個老人獨居在北愛爾蘭，他的獨生子正在坐牢。老人想在花園裡種些土豆，但不知道誰可以幫忙把泥土翻鬆。他寫信想兒子提及此事，兒子回信說道：“看在上帝的面上，千萬不要翻鬆花園的泥土，我把槍埋在那兒了。”

　　At 4 AM the next morning, a dozen British soldiers showed up and dug up the entire garden,but didn't find any guns.

　　第二天凌晨4點，一隊英國士兵出現在老人家中，在花園把土地翻遍，但並沒有找到任何槍支。”

　　Confused, the man wrote to his son telling him what happened and asking him what to do next.

　　老人寫信告訴兒子這件奇怪的事情，問到底發生了什麼事情，下一步應該怎麼做。

　　His son's reply was: Just plant your potatoes.

　　兒子回信道：“你只管種土豆好了。”