關於幽默英語笑話大全

　　英語笑話作為一種特殊的交際策略，它能夠幫助人們緩解尷尬的氣氛，從而保持和諧的人際關係。下面是小編帶來的關於幽默英語笑話，歡迎閱讀!

　　關於幽默英語笑話篇一

　　in a sales company, the boss said to one of his employees,

　　銷售公司的老闆對一位員工訓話：

　　"the main thing to remember is repetition, repetition, repetition! that's the key! if you have a product to sell, keep harping on it in every way possible. repeat it; cram it down people's throats. even make yourself sickening and repulsive if you have to, but don't everforget to repeat, repeat, repeat. it's the only way to get results and sell our products!"

　　“重要的是要記得重複、重複、重複!‘不斷重複’是重要關鍵!推銷產品時，要用盡各種方法對客戶不斷反覆地遊說，對他們進行疲勞轟炸。情況需

　　要的話，即使讓對方對你厭惡、反感也在所不惜。就是不要忘記‘重複再重複!’這是得到業績、銷售產品的不二法門!”

　　so, the employee said, "yes, sir!"

　　員工回答：“老闆，瞭解了!”

　　then the boss said, "now, what was it you came to see me about?"

　　老闆又說：“好，現在說說看你們來找我有什麼事?”

　　and the employee replied, "well, sir, it's about a raise, a raise, a raise!"

　　員工回答：“老闆，我要加薪!加薪!加薪!”

　　關於幽默英語笑話篇二

　　The Cemetery Shortcut

　　為抄近路走墓地

　　Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs.

　　萬聖節派對過後，兩男人圖個樂呵，打算抄近路穿過墓地回家。

　　Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.

　　走到墓地中央時，他們被從迷霧中傳來的“答、答、答”聲驚嚇到了。

　　Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

　　正當兩人害怕得渾身顫抖時，他們看到是個老頭拿著鐵錘和鑿子，在一塊墓石上鑿著什麼。

　　"Holy cow, Mister," one of them said after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death -- we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?"

　　“哇塞，先生，”其中一人喘了口氣說，“你把我們嚇得半死啊，我們還以為遇上鬼了呢!那麼晚了你在這裡做什麼?”

　　"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!"

　　“那幫白痴!”老頭抱怨道，“他們把我名字拼錯啦!”

　　關於幽默英語笑話篇三

　　who was the first man? 誰是世界上第一個男人

　　a teacher said to her class:”who was the first man?”

　　一個老師問她的學生：“誰是世界上第一個男人”

　　“george washington,” a little boy shouted promptly.

　　一個小男孩立刻大聲說：“喬治.華盛頓。”

　　“how do you make out that george washington was the first man?”asked the teacher，smiling indulgently.

　　老師帶著寵溺的笑容問這個男生：“你如何證明喬治華盛頓是世界上第一個男人呢。”

　　“because,” said the little boy, “he was first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen.”

　　這個男孩子說：“因為，他是第一個挑起戰爭，第一個主張和平，並且是第一個深得民心的人。”

　　關於幽默英語笑話篇四

　　but at this point a larger boy held up his hand. “well,” said the teacher to him, “who do you think was the first man?”

　　這時，有一個年齡稍大的男孩子舉起手來，老師問他，“你認為誰是世界第一個男人?”

　　“i don’t know what his name was, ” said the larger boy, “but i know it wasn’t george washington, ma’am, because the history book says george washington married a widow, so, of course, there must have been a man ahead of him.”

　　男孩回答說：“我不知道他的名字，但是我肯定他不是喬治華盛頓，因為歷史書上說，喬治華盛頓和一個寡婦結婚了，所以在他之前，當然還有一個男的啦。”

　　關於幽默英語笑話篇五

　　母親與教師

　　I teach middle-school choir and occasionally have my own children in class. One day my son asked if he could have a pencil. As a teacher,I normally do not lend items to unprepared students;but as a mother，I help my children whenever I can. I asked my son whether he was speaking to his teacher or his mother. He replied，“It degends on who has the pencil."

　　我教初中的唱詩班，偶爾會教到自己的孩子。一天，我兒子問我是否能借給他一支鉛筆。作為一位老師，我一般不借東西給那些不做課堂準備的學生。但作為一位母親，我應隨時幫助我的孩子。於是，我問兒子他是在跟老師說話，還是在跟母親說話。而他卻說:“那要看誰有鉛筆了。”