經典英語笑話故事帶翻譯

　　笑話可以給人帶來了很多好處。比如：多交朋友、讓自己膽子變大等等。小編整理了，歡迎閱讀!

　　：萬聖夜墓地奇遇

　　Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs.

　　萬聖節派對過後，兩男人圖個樂呵，打算抄近路穿過墓地回家。

　　Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.

　　走到墓地中央時，他們被從迷霧中傳來的“答、答、答”聲驚嚇到了。

　　Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

　　正當兩人害怕得渾身顫抖時，他們看到是個老頭拿著鐵錘和鑿子，在一塊墓石上鑿著什麼。

　　"Holy cow, Mister," one of them said after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death -- we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?"

　　“哇塞，先生，”其中一人喘了口氣說，“你把我們嚇得半死啊，我們還以為遇上鬼了呢!那麼晚了你在這裡做什麼?”

　　"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!"

　　“那幫白痴!”老頭抱怨道，“他們把我名字拼錯啦!”

　　：最醜的孩子?

　　A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen."

　　一位女士抱著她的寶寶上公交車，司機看到後說：“額，那是我這輩子見過的最醜的小孩。”

　　The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me." The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."

　　女士走到車廂後面坐下，感到很憤怒。她對旁邊的男士說：“司機剛剛羞辱了我。”男士迴應說：“你快上去斥責他。去吧，我替你抱著你的猴子。”

　　：我們分享一切

　　An elderly couple goes to Burger King, where they carefully split a burger and fries.

　　一對老夫婦在漢堡王餐廳吃飯，他們小心翼翼地將漢堡和薯條分成兩份。

　　A trucker takes pity on them and offers to buy the wife her own meal.

　　一個卡車司機非常同情他們，就提議想給老太太單獨點一份。

　　"It's all right," says the husband. "We share everything."

　　“沒關係的。”老先生說，“我們分享一切。”

　　A few minutes later, the trucker notices that the wife hasn't taken a bite.

　　幾分鐘後，卡車司機注意到老太太還沒動口吃一點東西。

　　"I really wouldn't mind buying your wife her own meal," he insists.

　　他再次對老先生說，“我真的不介意請您妻子吃一頓……”

　　"She'll eat," the husband assures him. "We share everything."

　　“她會吃的，”老先生向他保證，“我們分享一切。”

　　Unconvinced, the trucker implores the wife, "Why aren't you eating?"

　　司機不太相信，懇求老太太，“你為什麼不吃一點?”

　　The wife snaps, "Because I'm waiting for the teeth!"

　　老太太咂咂嘴，“我在等他的假牙。”