英語短笑話大全爆笑

　　笑話以其短小的篇幅,洗練的文筆,幽默的情節,獨有的魅力吸引著我們每一個人,成為大家茶餘飯後的調味劑。小編精心收集了爆笑英語短笑話，供大家欣賞學習!

　　爆笑英語短笑話篇1

　　Student A: When do people talk least?

　　學生甲: 人們在什麼時候說話最少?

　　Student B: In February.

　　學生乙: 在二月。

　　Student A: Why?

　　學生甲: 為什麼呢?

　　Student B: Because February is the shortest month of a year.

　　學生乙: 因為二月是一年中最短的一個月。

　　爆笑英語短笑話篇2

　　A young man came home from work and found his bride upset. "I feel terrible,” she said. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers.”

　　丈夫下班回到家裡，發現自己的新娘心緒煩亂。“我心裡太難受了，”她說。“我在給你熨西裝時把褲子的臀部燒了個大洞。”

　　“Forget it ,” consoled her husband. “Remember that I’ve got an extra pair of pants for that suit.”

　　“沒事兒，”丈夫安慰她說。“你忘了我這套衣服有兩條褲子。”

　　“Yes,” said the woman, cheering up. "And it’s lucky you have. I used them to patch the hole.”

　　“是的，”妻子高興地說，“幸虧你還有一條，我後來就用它來補了這個洞了。”

　　爆笑英語短笑話篇3

　　Carlson was charged with stealing a Mercedes Benz, and after a long trial, the jury acquitted him. Later that day Carlson came back to the judge who had presided at the hearing.

　　卡爾森被指控盜竊一輛賓士轎車，經過長時間的審訊，陪審團將他無罪釋放。之後，卡爾森找到了聽證會上主持的法官。

　　“Your honor,” he said, “I want to get out a warrant for that dirty lawyer of mine.”

　　“法官大人，”他說，“我想申請一張逮捕令抓捕那個骯髒的律師。”

　　“Why?” asked the judge, “He won your acquittal. What do you want to have him arrested for?”

　　“為什麼?”法官問，“他讓你贏得了無罪釋放。難道他有什麼罪嗎?”

　　“Well，your honor,”replied Carlson, “I didn't have the money to pay his fee, so he went and took the car I stole.”

　　“是的，法官大人，”卡爾森回答，“我沒有錢付我的律師費，他就把我那輛偷來的車開走了。”