爆笑英文笑話帶翻譯精選
如果你的幽默純粹是為了好玩、好笑,你純粹是不想要太嚴肅地面對生命而開開玩笑、講講笑話的話,那是不會有任何問題的。小編整理了爆笑英文笑話帶翻譯,歡迎閱讀!
爆笑英文笑話帶翻譯:打獵祕籍
Two Russian hunters meet. "I shot a gigantic bear yesterday," says Ivan. "Look at the hide!"
"How do you find such huge bears?" Sergei asks.
"Easy," says Ivan. "You stand in front of a cave and whistle. When the bear comes out, you shoot."
Weeks later the two meet again. Sergei is covered in bandages. "Didn't you follow my advice?" Ivan asks.
"Sure I did. I stood, in front of a cave and whistled, " Sergei replies.
"And what came out?"
"To me, "says Sergei, "it looked like the Trans-Siberian Express."
兩個俄國獵人相遇。“我昨天打了一隻巨熊,”伊凡說,“看看這獸皮!”
“你是如何發現這麼大的熊的?”謝爾蓋問道。
“很簡單,”伊凡說,“你站在一個洞前並吹哨子。熊出來時你就開槍。”
幾周後,兩人見面了。謝爾蓋渾身纏滿了繃帶。“難道你沒有聽我的建議?”伊凡問。
“我當然是按你的建議做的。我站在一個洞前並吹哨子,”謝爾蓋回答說。
“出來了什麼?”
“向著我來的,”謝爾蓋說,“像是穿越西伯利亞的快車。”
爆笑英文笑話帶翻譯:一封特別的感謝信
Once I received a thank-you note from a friend whom I had helped. In the envelope were fivelottery tickets that had been scratched, revealing the numbers. "Thank you very much foryour help," the note read. "As a gift, I bought you some lottery tickets- sorry you didn't win. "
有一次,我收到一封感謝信,是一個我曾幫助過的朋友寄來的。信封內有五張彩票,都被刮過了,露出了數字。“非常感謝您的幫助,”信上寫道,“作為禮物,我給您買了些彩票——真遺憾,您沒中獎。”
爆笑英文笑話帶翻譯:委婉的報喪方式
Two brothers, Herbert and James, lived with their mother and a cat named Edgar. James wasparticularly attached to the cat, and when he had to leave town for several days, he left Herbertmeticulous instructions about the pet' s care. At the end of this first day away. Jamestelephoned his brother. "How is Edgar?"
"Edgar is dead." Herbert answered. There was a pause. Then James said, "Herbert, you'reinsensitive, you know how close I was to Edgar —you should have broken the news to meslowly. When I asked about Edgar tonight, you should have said, 'Edgar's on the roof , but Ihave called the fire department to get him down.' And tomorrow when I called, you could havesaid the firemen were having trouble getting Edgar down, but you were hopeful they wouldsucceed. Then when I called the third time, you could have told me that the fire-men have donetheir best, but unfortunately Edgar had fallen off the roof and was at the veterinarian's. Thenwhen I called the last time, you could have said that although everything possible had beendone for Edgar, he had died. That's the way a sensitive man would have told me about Edgar.And, oh, before I forget," James added, "how is mother?"
"Oh," Herbert said, pausing for a moment, "She' s on the roof."
郝伯特和詹姆斯兄弟二人一起生活,家中有一老母並養了一隻貓叫埃德格。詹姆斯特別喜歡這隻貓。有一次他要外出幾天,臨行前不厭其煩地囑咐郝伯特照顧好這隻寵物。出門後的頭一天晚上,他打來電話詢問:“埃德格好嗎?”
“它死了,”郝伯格回答。一陣沉默之後,詹姆斯說:“郝伯特,你真沒心沒肺,你知道我多麼喜歡埃德格——你應該把這個訊息慢慢地告訴我。當我問起埃德格今晚怎樣時,你應該說,‘埃德格爬上了屋頂,我已給消防隊打了電話,讓他們把它救下來。’我明天又給你打電話時,你應該說消防隊營救埃德格遇到了困難,但你相信他們會成功。在我第三天給你打電話時,你可以說消防隊員已盡了最大努力,但很不幸,埃德格從屋頂上掉了下來,被送到獸醫那裡。在我最後一次給你打電話詢問,你可以說盡管對埃德格做了一切所能做的努力,它還是死了。這是一個富有感情的人告訴我埃德格的訊息時所用的方式。哦,趁我沒忘記還有件事順便問一下,”詹姆斯補充道,“母親好嗎?”
“哦……”一陣沉默後郝伯特答道,“她上了屋頂。”
簡短爆笑英文笑話欣賞