有關較長一點的英語笑話

　　網路笑話一般是緊抓當前的網上發生的熱門事件，並由網友製作傳播的一種笑話。本文是，希望對大家有幫助!

　　：真實年齡

　　In court a judge asked the witness, “How old are you? I mean, really, how old are you? And remember, you’re under oath, so tell the truth.”

　　The woman replied, “I’m twenty one and some months.”

　　The judge said, “Be specific: how many months?”

　　So she said, “One hundred and eighteen months.”

　　庭上的法官問證人：“您多大了?我的意思是，真實年齡是多少?別忘了剛才你已經宣誓過，所以請誠實作答。”

　　女士回答：“我二十一歲又幾個月。”

　　法官說：“要講精確，到底是多少個月?”

　　她回答：“一百一十八個月!”

　　：我就是新郎。

　　A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street.

　　"But officer," the man began, "I can explain."

　　"Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back."

　　"But, officer, I just wanted to say,..."

　　"And I said to keep quiet! You're going to jail!"

　　A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you that the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."

　　"Don't count on it," answered the fellow in the cell,"I'm the groom."

　　在一個小鎮裡，一個警官攔住了一個在主街道上超速行駛的騎摩托車者。

　　“但是，警官，”這個男人開口說，“聽我解釋，”

　　“安靜，”警官打斷了他，“我要讓你到監獄裡做冷板凳，一直到長官回來。”

　　“但是警官，我只是想說…”

　　“我說過了，安靜，你將要下監獄!!”

　　幾個小時之後，警官看著他的犯人說，“你足夠的幸運，長官正在參見他女兒的婚禮，當他回來的時候一定心情不錯。”

　　“別指望了，”監獄裡的夥計說，“我就是新郎。”

　　：He Was Only Wrong by Two

　　Jack Hawkins was the football coach at an Amercian college, and he was always trying to find good players, but they weren‘t always smart enought to be accepted by the college.

　　One day the coach brought an excellent young player to the dean of the college and asked that the student be allowed to enter without an examination. "Well," the dean said after some persuasion, "I‘d better ask him a few questions first."

　　Then he turned to the student and asked him some very easy questions, but the student didn‘t know any of the answers.

　　At last the dean said, "Well, what‘s five times seven?"

　　The student thought for a long time and then answered, "Thirty-six."

　　The dean threw up his hands and looked at the coach in despair, but the coach said earnestly, "Oh, please let him in, sir! He was only wrong by two."