關於英語短篇笑話劇本

　　笑話作為一種城市化的民間口頭創作體裁,是一種重要的交際手段。小編精心收集了，供大家欣賞學習!

　　：Only child

　　"Mom, my teacher asked me today if I had any brothers or sisters who will be coming to school."

　　"That's nice of her to take such an interest, dear. What did she say when you told her you are the only child?" asked the mother.

　　"She just said, 'Thank goodness!'" said the boy.

　　：Who discovered Australia

　　Teacher: Find Australia on the map for me, Johnny.

　　Johnny: It's here, sir.

　　Teacher: That's right. Now Sammy, who discovered Australia?

　　Sammy: Johnny, sir.

　　：A garbage collector 垃圾收集工

　　John was ten years old, and he was a very lazy boy.

　　He had to go to school of course, but he was bored there and tried to do as little work as possible. His father and mother were both doctors and they hoped that he would become one, too, when he grew up, but one day Lohn said to his mother, "When I finish school, I want to become a garbage collector."

　　"A garbage collector?" his mother asked. She was very surprised. "That's not a very pleasant job. Why do you want to become a garbage collector?"

　　"Because then I'd only have to work one day a week," Lohn answered.

　　"Only one day a week?" his mother said. "What do you mean?"

　　"Well," John answered, "I know that the ones who come to our house only work on Wednesday, because I only see them on that day."

　　約翰10歲了，是一個非常懶的男孩子。

　　當然他必須去上學，但他厭煩學校，並儘可能地少做功課。他父母親兩人都是醫生，他們兩人都希望當他長大後也當個醫生，但有一天，約翰對他母親說，“我上完學，我想當個垃圾收集工。”

　　“垃圾收集工?” 他母親問道。他母親非常吃驚。“那可不是一件令人愉快的工作。你為什麼想當一個垃圾收集工呢?”

　　“因為到時候我只需一週工作一天，” 約翰回答說。

　　“一週只工作一天?” 他母親說。“你是什麼意思?”

　　“嗯，” 約翰回答說，“我知道來我們家的那些人只在星期三上班，因為我只在星期三看見他們。”

　　：Mother

　　A girl was throwing stones at a cow. Her father came & scolded her for throwing the stones at the cow & then told to her that cows are like mothers to them & should be respected. Next day guests come to their to their house & asked for her father. She said "Father is pressing breast of mother".

　　：The Surprise Gift

　　On the last day of kindergarten, the children brought presents for their teacher.

　　The florist's son gave her a box. She shook it, held it up, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Is it flowers?"

　　"That's right!" said the boy.

　　Then the candy store owner's son gave her his package. She shook it, held it up, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Is it a box of candy?"

　　"That's right!" said the boy.

　　Next the liquor store owner's son handed her his box. She shook it, held it up, and noticed that it was leaking. She touched a drop with her finger and tasted it. "I bet I know what it is. Is it wine?"

　　"No," said the boy.

　　She touched another drop to her tongue. "Is it Champagne?"

　　"No," said the boy.

　　"I give up. What is it?"

　　The boy grinned. "A puppy!"