短一些的爆笑英語笑話

　　在民間文學的各種體裁中 ,民間笑話的材料很多 ,也是時下最為流行的民間敘事型別。小編分享，希望可以幫助大家!

　　：Where is your beard?

　　After many years, a young Jewish Talmud student who had left the old country for America returns to visit the family. "But--where is your beard?" asks his mother upon seeing him. "Mama," he replies, "in America, nobody wears a beard." "But at least you keep the Sabbath?" "Mama, business is business. In America, everybody works on the Sabbath." "But kosher food you still eat?" "Mama, in America, it is very difficult to keep kosher." The old lady ponders this information and then leans over and whispers in his ear, "Isaac, tell me--you’re still circumcised?"

　　：Polly Want a WHAT?

　　This lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."

　　"What do they say?" the priest asked.

　　"They only know how to say, 'Hi, we are prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?'"

　　"That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "But I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two talking female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots who I have taught to pray and read the Bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn to pray and worship."

　　"Thank you," said the lady.

　　The next day, the lady brings her female parrots to the priest's house. The priest's two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage.

　　The lady puts her female talking parrots in with the male talking parrots and the female parrots say, "Hi, we are prostitutes! Do you want to have some fun?"

　　One male parrot looks over to the other male parrot and screams, "Frank! Put the Bibles away--our prayers have been answered!"

　　：It's in the Bible

　　During his sermon one Sunday, the local preacher told his congregation

　　that the entire range of human experience could be found in the Bible. He

　　confidently stated, "If anything can happen to humans, it is described

　　somewhere in the Bible."

　　After the service, a woman came up to the preacher and said, "Reverend,

　　I don't think the Bible mentions anything about PMS."

　　The preacher told the woman he was certain he could find a reference to PMS

　　somewhere in scripture.

　　During the following week, he searched diligently, book-by-book, chapter-by-chapter

　　and verse-by-verse.

　　On the following Sunday, the woman came up to him and asked, "Did you

　　find any references to PMS in the Bible?"

　　The preacher smiled, opened his Bible and began to read, "... and Mary rode

　　Joseph's ass all the way to Bethlehem."

　　：Priest Golfing

　　A priest and doctor were out golfing. The doctor gets up to take his first shot. He swings and misses the ball completely.

　　"God dammit, I missed," says the doctor.

　　The sky starts to darken a bit becoming overcast.

　　"Don't use the Lord God's name in vain," says the priest.

　　"I am sorry, Father," replies the doctor.

　　The doctor steps up again to tee off and misses the ball once again.

　　"God dammit, I missed," says the doctor.

　　The sky darkens even more and a low rumble resounds throughout the land.

　　"Don't use the Lord God's name in vain," says the priest.

　　"I am sorry, Father," replies the doctor.

　　Once again, the doctor tries to take a swing at the ball and completely misses. He throws his club to the ground and yells, "God dammit, I missed."

　　The heavens roared and the storm erupted, sending a lightning bolt down and straight into the priest, which struck him dead.

　　Then a booming voice arose from the sky and said, "Dammit, I missed."