爆笑英語笑話小短文大全

　　笑話是日常生活中人們消遣娛樂的一種常見語言現象,其目的在於在會話過程中傳遞和激發幽默感。小編分享爆笑英語笑話小短文，希望可以幫助大家!

　　爆笑英語笑話小短文：Modern world morals

　　Two bishops were discussing the decline in morals in the modern world.

　　"I didn't sleep with my wife before I was married," said one clergyman self-righteously, "Did you?"

　　"I don't know," said the other. "What was her maiden name?"

　　爆笑英語笑話小短文：Suspicious Rabbi

　　Father Shaughnessy found himself next to Rabbi Ginsberg at a charity function and could not help but notice that the rabbi was picking at his food as though he suspected it of being less than kosher.

　　Smiling slyly, the good priest whispered, "Come, Rabbi, when are you going to break down and eat a nice slice of ham?"

　　"At your wedding, Father," said Rabbi Ginsberg at once.

　　爆笑英語笑話小短文：The End Is Near

　　A priest and pastor from the local parishes are standing by the side of the road holding up a sign that reads, "The End is Near! Turn yourself around now before it's too late!"

　　They planned to hold up the sign to each passing car.

　　"Leave us alone you religious nuts!" yelled the first driver as he sped by.

　　From around the curve they heard screeching tires and a big splash.

　　"Do you think," said one clergy to the other, "we should just put up a sign that says 'Bridge Out' instead?"

　　爆笑英語笑話小短文：Watched By Jesus

　　A burglar broke into a home and was looking around. He heard a soft voice say, "Jesus is watching you". Thinking it was just his imagination, he continued his search. Again the voice said "Jesus is watching you". He turned his flashlight around and saw a parrot in a cage. He asked the parrot if he was the one talking and the parrot said, "yes." He asked the parrot what his name was and the parrot said, "Moses." The burglar asked, "what kind of people would name a parrot Moses?" The parrot said, "the same kind of people who would name their pit bull Jesus".

　　爆笑英語笑話小短文：The Confession

　　Matthew goes into a confessional box and says "Bless me father for I have sinned, I have been with a loose woman."

　　The Priest says "is that you Matthew?"

　　"Yes father, it is I."

　　"Who was the woman you were with?"

　　"I cannot tell you for I do not wish to sully her reputation."

　　The priest asks "Was it Brenda O'Malley?"

　　"No father."

　　"Was it Fiona MacDonald?"

　　"No father."

　　"Was it Ann Brown?"

　　"No father, I cannot tell you."

　　The priest says "I admire your perseverance but you must atone for your sins. Yourpenance will be five Our Fathers and four Hail Marys."

　　Matthew goes back to his pew and his buddy Sean slides over and asks "What did you get?" Matthew replies "I got five Our Fathers, four Hail Marys and three good leads."

　　爆笑英語笑話小短文：Holy Golf

　　Jesus and Saint Peter are golfing. St. Peter steps up to the tee on a par three and hits one long and straight. It reaches the green. Jesus is up next. He slices it. It heads over the fence into traffic on an adjacent street. Bounces off a truck, onto the roof of a nearby shack and into the raingutter, down the drain spout and onto a lilly pad at the edge of a lake. A frog jumps up and snatches the ball in his mouth. An eagle swoops down, grabs the frog. As the eagle flies over the green, the frog croaks and drops the ball. It’s in the hole. Saint Peter looks at Jesus,exasperated. "Are you gonna play golf?" he asks "Or are you just gonna fuck around?"