關於聖誕節英文小笑話

　　笑話對於我們每個人來說是最熟悉的東西了，笑話的娛樂作用可以減輕人的心理壓力,促進身體健康。本文是，希望對大家有幫助!

　　：A Christmas Gift

　　聖誕禮物

　　A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas.

　　聖誕節來了，一位先生給他太太送的聖誕禮物是一個非常漂亮的鑽石戒子。

　　After hearing about this extravagant gift, a friend of his said, "I thought she wanted one of those sporty four-wheel-drive vehicles."

　　他朋友聽到他買這麼奢侈的禮物後，說到：“她不是想要輛四驅車嗎”。

　　"She did," he replied. "But where was I going to find a fake Jeep?"

　　先生答：“是啊，***可以買到假鑽石***，可去哪裡能買一輛假吉普車呢?”

　　：An Axe to Grind

　　A boy begs his father to get him a Christmas tree this year.

　　一個孩子求他爸爸，說能不能今年為家裡準備一棵聖誕樹

　　Each year, the boy asks and the father tells him, "I don't want to pay for it."

　　小男孩每年求他爸爸得到的都是同樣的回答“我可不想為一棵樹付錢。”***這個爸爸肯定不是基督教徒，而且還非常摳門***

　　But the son kept begging. Unable to bear his son's whining, he picks up his axe one day and heads out of the house.

　　但是小男孩不放棄的一直祈求，終於有一天，他爸被他的哀求折磨得受不了，他拿起一把斧子，直接衝出了門。

　　Thirty minutes later he returns with a great big Christmas tree. "How did you cut it down so fast?" his son asks.

　　30分鐘後，他爸爸帶著一棵超大的聖誕樹回到了家。他兒子問：“你怎麼會砍得那麼快?”

　　"I didn't cut it down," the father replies.

　　他爸爸回答到：“我不是砍的”

　　"I got it at a tree lot."

　　“我是從一個聖誕樹銷售中心拿的”

　　"Then why did you bring an axe?"

　　“那你為什麼還要帶把斧子去呢?”

　　"Because I didn't want to pay."

　　“因為我不想付錢”***敢情這爸爸***啊***

　　：Entering Heaven

　　進天堂

　　Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

　　三名男子都死於平安夜，而後分別在天堂之門被聖彼得召見。

　　"In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."

　　聖彼得說：“因為這個神聖的節日，你們每個人都必須有象徵聖誕節的物品才能進入天堂”。

　　The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said. "You may pass through the pearly gates," Saint Peter said.

　　第一名男子從他得口袋裡掏出了個打火機，他打燃打火機說：“它代表蠟燭”。於是聖彼得就讓他進入了天堂。

　　The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells." Saint Peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."

　　第二個男子從口袋裡掏出一串鑰匙，他把鑰匙在手裡搖了搖說：“它們是鈴鐺”聖誕老人也讓他上了天堂。

　　The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's glasses.

　　第三個男子絕望的在口袋裡掏了半天，最後掏出了一副女人的眼鏡。

　　St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"

　　聖彼得挑了挑眉，看向這個男的，說：“你倒是說說這玩意兒代表什麼?”

　　The man replied, "They're Carol's."

　　男士答到：“她們是卡羅爾的”***最後的carol's，我好久才發現s前有個'，我還說眼鏡跟聖誕頌歌有半毛錢關係?***

　　小編注：看懂了沒?carol's和carols同音，carol在這裡是一個女士的名字，carols是聖誕頌歌，所以第三個男的借用同音字說了個聖誕的象徵。