好笑簡單的地道英文笑話

　　冷笑話由於表演者語氣或表情等原因,導致一個笑話不能達到好笑的目的,較難引人發笑而成冷場。下面小編整理了，希望大家喜歡!

　　摘抄

　　一廂情願的誤會

　　t the supermarket I noticed an elderly man who seemed to be following me wherever I went.As I moved to each aisle, there he was, smiling at me. Now I was wondering if he wasinterested in me. At the dairy counter I was checking out the eggs when I felt a tap on myshoulder. Turning around, I saw that it was the same man. "Lady," he finally said, "you havemy shopping cart."

　　在超市我注意到一位上了年紀的男子好像總在跟著我。我每到一個售貨通道，他就跟我到一個售貨通道，微笑地看著我。我開始想他是不是喜歡上我了。在乳品櫃，我正給雞蛋包裝結賬時，有人在我肩上輕拍了一下。我轉過身發現還是那個男子。“女士，”他終於開口說話了，“你用著我的購物車呢。”

　　鑑賞

　　一直裝到免費為止

　　Deciding to do some back-yard landscaping, my father-in-law went to the brickyard to buy quantity of brick. When he asked the salesclerk about the cost, the man replied. "The more you buy, the cheaper they are."

　　"Is that so?" said my father-in-law." Then just keep loading them on my truck until they're free.

　　我岳父打算買些磚來修整一下後院。他到磚廠拉磚，當問到磚價時，售貨員回答說：“買得越多，價格越低。”

　　“真的嗎?”我岳父說，“那麼往我的卡車上猛裝吧，一直裝到免費為止。”

　　賞析

　　世界上最好的售貨員

　　arry saw an ad in a window. It said: "Wanted. The Best Sales- man in the World. Top Pay."

　　" I' m a great salesman." Harry told himself." I can sell anything. I'll go in and ask for thatjob."

　　He went into the building and spoke to the manager.

　　"I'm the best salesman in the world," he said. "Give me the job. "

　　"You must prove you're the best," the manager said.

　　"I'll pass every test you give me." Harry told him.

　　"Good."

　　The manager took a box of candy out of his desk .

　　"Last week, I bought a thousand boxes of this candy. If you can sell them all before theend of the week, you can have the job.

　　"That's easy," Harry said.

　　He took the box of candy and left the office.

　　Every day and all day, he went from shop to shop, trying to sell boxes of the candy .

　　He couldn't sell one.

　　The candy was so bad he couldn't even give it away.

　　At the end of the week he went back to the manager.

　　"I'm sorry, sir, " he said," I was wrong about myself . I'm not the best salesman in theworld, but I know who is.

　　"Oh," said the manager. "Who?"

　　"The person who sold you a thousand boxes of this candy, " Harry said.

　　哈里在櫥窗上看到一則廣告。上面寫著：“招聘世界上最好的售貨員，報酬優厚。”

　　“我是一名了不起的售貨員，”哈里自言自語，“任何東西我都能賣出去，我要進去應聘這份工作。”

　　他走進大樓去和經理說這件事。

　　“我是世界上最好的售貨員，”他說，“把這件工作給我吧。”

　　“你必須證明你是最好的，”經理說。

　　“我會通過你給我的每一次考驗的。”哈里告訴他。

　　“好。”

　　經理從桌子裡取出一箱糖果。

　　“我上星期買了一千箱這種糖果。如果你能在週末之前把這些全賣出去，你就能得到這份工作。”

　　“這很簡單。”哈里說。

　　他拿著這箱糖果離開了辦公室。

　　每天從早到晚，他從這家店走到那家店，竭力想賣出一千箱糖果。

　　結果他一箱也沒賣出去。

　　糖果質量太差，以至於送人都沒人要。

　　週末他回去見經理。

　　“很抱歉，先生，”他說，“我搞錯了。我不是世界上最好的售貨員，但我知道誰是最好的。”

　　“哦，”經理問，“是誰?”

　　“是把這一千箱糖果賣給你的人，”哈里說。