大學經典英語笑話精選

　　笑話一般比較短小,喜劇性很強,普遍存在於人們的日常生活中。笑話的娛樂作用可以減輕人的心理壓力,促進身體健康。小編精心收集了大學經典英語笑話，供大家欣賞學習!

　　大學經典英語笑話：Three very tough mice

　　Three rats are sitting at the bar talking bragging about their bravery and toughness.

　　The first says, "I'm so tough, once I ate a whole bagful of rat poison!"

　　The second says, "Well I'm so tough, once I was caught in a rat trap and I bit it apart!"

　　Then the third rat gets up and says, "Later guys, I'm off home to harass the cat."

　　大學經典英語笑話：Worries about mad cow disease

　　There were these two cows, chatting over the fence between their fields.The first cow said, "I tell you, this mad-cow-disease is really pretty scary. They say it is spreading fast; I heard it hit some cows down on the Johnson Farm."The other cow replies, "I ain't worried, it don't affect us ducks."

　　大學經典英語笑話：A snail buys a fast new car

　　There was once a snail who was sick and tired of his reputation for being so slow. He decided to get some fast wheels to make up the difference. After shopping around a while, he decided that the Datson 240-Z was the car to get. So the snail goes to the nearest Datsun dealer and says he wants to buy the 240-Z, but he wants it repainted "240-S".

　　The dealer asks, "Why 'S'?"

　　The snail replies, "'S' stands for snail. I want everybody who sees me roaring past to know who's driving."

　　Well, the dealer doesn't want to lose the unique opportunity to sell a car to a snail, so he agrees to have the car repainted for a small fee.

　　The snail gets his new car and spent the rest of his days roaring happily down the highway at top speed. And whenever anyone would see him zooming by, they'd say "Wow! Look at that S-car go!"

　　大學經典英語笑話：These chickens want books

　　A pair of chickens walk up to the circulation desk at a public library and say, 'Buk Buk BUK.' The librarian decides that the chickens desire three books, and gives it to them...and the chickens leave shortly thereafter.

　　Around midday, the two chickens return to the circulation desk quite vexed and say,' Buk Buk BuKKOOK!' The librarian decides that the chickens desire another three books and gives it to them. The chickens leave as before.

　　The two chickens return to the library in the early afternoon, approach the librarian, looking very annoyed and say, 'Buk Buk Buk Buk Bukkooook!' The librarian is now a little suspicious of these chickens. She gives them what they request, and decides to follow them.

　　She followed them out of the library, out of the town, and to a park. At this point, she hid behind a tree, not wanting to be seen. She saw the two chickens throwing the books at a frog in a pond, to which the frog was saying, "Rrredit Rrredit Rrredit..."

　　大學經典英語笑話：They're boasting about race records

　　Some race horses staying in a stable. One of them starts to boast about his track record. "In the last 15 races, I've won 8 of them!"

　　Another horse breaks in, "Well in the last 27 races, I've won 19!!"

　　"Oh that's good, but in the last 36 races, I've won 28!", says another, flicking his tail.

　　At this point, they notice that a greyhound dog has been sitting there listening. "I don't mean to boast," says the greyhound, "but in my last 90 races, I've won 88 of them!"

　　The horses are clearly amazed. "Wow!" says one, after a hushed silence. "A talking dog."