關於短篇的英語笑話欣賞

　　笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆。與此同時,笑話也是人們反對極權和專制制度的有力武器。本文是，希望對大家有幫助!

　　：Purchasing a new bird

　　After many years of marriage, a husband has turned into a couch potato, became completely inattentive to his wife and satguzzling beer and watching TV all day. The wife was dismayed because no matter what she did to attract the husband's attention, he'd just shrug her off with some bored comment.

　　This went on for many months and the wife was going crazy with boredom. Then one day at a pet store, the wife saw this big, ugly, snorting bird with a hairy chest, powerful hairy forearms, beady eyes and dribble running down the side of its mouth.

　　The shopkeeper, observing her fascination with the bird, told her it was a special imported "Goony bird" and it had a very peculiar trait. To demonstrate, he exclaimed, "Goony bird! The table!"

　　Immediately, the Goony bird flew off its perch and with single-minded fury attacked the table and smashed it into a hundred little pieces with its powerful forearms and claws! To demonstrate some more, the shopkeeper said, "Goony bird! The shelf!"

　　Again the Goony bird turned to the shelf and demolished it in seconds.

　　"Wow!" said the wife, "If this doesn't attract my husband's attention, nothing will!" So she bought the bird and took it home.

　　When she entered the house, the husband was, as usual, sprawled on the sofa guzzling beer and watching the game. "Honey!" she exclaimed, "I've got a surprise for you! A Goony bird!"

　　The husband, in his usual bored tone replied, "Goony Bird, my foot!"

　　：The cowboy without a horse

　　A cowboy rode into town and stopped at the saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on newcomers. When he finished, he found his horse had been stolen.

　　He comes back into the bar, handily flips his gun into the air, catches it above his head without even looking and fires a shot into the ceiling. "Who stole my horse?" he yelled with surprising forcefulness.

　　No one answered.

　　"I'm gonna have another beer and if my horse ain't back outside by the time I'm finished, I'm gonna do what I dun back in Texas and I don't want to have to do what I dun back in Texas!"

　　Some of the locals shifted restlessly.

　　He had another beer, walked outside, and his horse was back! He saddled up and started

　　：How To Deal with a Doberman

　　A highly timid little man, Casper Milquetoast, ventured into a biker bar in the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, 'Um, err, which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outside to the parking meter?'

　　A giant of a man, wearing biker leathers, his body hair growing out through the seams, turned slowly on his stool, looked down at the quivering little man and said, 'It's my dog. Why?'

　　'Well,' squeaked the little man, obviously very nervous, 'I believe my dog just killed it, sir.'

　　'What?' roared the big man in disbelief. 'What in the hell kind of dog do you have?'

　　'Sir,' answered the little man, 'It's a four week old puppy.'

　　'Bull!' roared the biker, 'How could your puppy kill my Doberman?'

　　'It appears that he choked on it, sir.'