有關於英文小笑話欣賞

　　笑話作為一種城市化的民間口頭創作體裁,是一種重要的交際手段。小編精心收集了有關於英文小笑話，供大家欣賞學習!

　　有關於英文小笑話：Catching A Tan

　　Joan, who was a rather well-proportioned secretary, spent almost all of her vacationsunbathing on the roof of her hotel. She wore a bathing suit the first day, but on the second, she decided that no one could see her way up there, and she slipped out of it for an overall tan. She'd hardly begun when she heard someone running up the stairs. She was lying on her stomach, so she just pulled a towel over her rear. "Excuse me, miss," said the flustered assistant manager of the hotel, out of breath from running up the stairs. "The Hilton doesn't mind your sunbathing on the roof, but we would very much appreciate your wearing a bathing suit as you did yesterday." "What difference does it make?" Joan asked rather calmly. "No one can see me up here, and besides, I'm covered with a towel." "Not exactly," said the embarrassed man. "You're lying on the dining room skylight."

　　有關於英文小笑話：Bad Language

　　A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon. When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother.

　　Her mother asked, "How was the honeymoon?"

　　"Oh, mama," she replied, "the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic..."

　　Suddenly she burst out crying. "But, mama, as soon as we returned Sam started using the most horrible language...things I'd never heard before!

　　I mean, all these awful 4-letter words! You've got to come get me and take me home.... Please mama!"

　　"Sarah, Sarah," her mother said, "calm down! Tell me, what could be so awful? What 4-letter words?"

　　"Please don't make me tell you, mama," wept the daughter, "I'm so embarrassed they're just too awful! Come get me, please!"

　　"Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset....Tell your mother these horrible 4-letter words!"

　　Still sobbing, the bride said, "Oh, mama...words like DUST, WASH, IRON, COOK...!"

　　有關於英文小笑話：Don't Step On A Duck!

　　Three young women in there thirties are on a road trip and are tearing down the freeway. unfortunatley, they lose control, the car flips over the guard rail on to the opposite lanes and gets smashed by an eighteen wheeler.

　　Up at the pearly gates, all three of them are greeted by St. Peter. He tells them. "All of you led very good lives down on earth, so all of you will be asmitted into paradise. The only rule: DON"T STEP ON THE DUCKS."

　　confused, they all ask "um...what?"

　　St. Peter says "if you step on one duck, it quacks. if a duck quacks, other ducks will start quacking, and...well...you'll see."

　　With that, the gates opened and the three waltzed inside. And, sure enough, All of heaven is covered with ducks. there is almost no room to walk with the millions of ducks.

　　a day of careful stepping later, the first woman steps on a duck. seconds later, every single duck in heaven is quacking. it's so loud the women aren't suprised if earth could hear it. hours later, when the quacking ceased, an angel appears with a ver ugly man and chains him to the lady and tells her this is her eternal punishment for the duck-stepping.

　　Not wanting the same fate, the other two women become very cautious for the next week, but sure enough, the second lady steps on a duck.

　　she gets the same punishment as the first lady.

　　The third lady becomes so careful that, a year-and-a-half later, she is still duck-free. then, an angel appears next to her with a very handsome man and chains him to her.

　　Thinking that this must be a reward for her good-doing she asks the man gleefully "What did I do to deserve this?"

　　And the man replies with a grimace, "I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck."

　　有關於英文小笑話：Poor Skunk

　　There was a man and his wife walking down the road on their way home.

　　The wife saw a baby skunk laying in the grass, so she decided to take it home and take care of it.

　　On the way home they came up to a river. The wife, concered for the skunk, asked her husband what to do with the skunk so he doesn't get wet.

　　The husband replied: "well, stick him up your dress".

　　The wife, again concered, asked: "what about the smell?".

　　The husband replied: "awww, he'll get use to it."

　　有關於英文小笑話：Funeral

　　A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery.

　　A long black hearse was followed by a second black hearse just 50 feet behind. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit bull on a leash. Behind her 200 women walking single file.

　　The woman's curiosity got the best of her. She respectfully approached the woman walking the dog and said, "I am so sorry for your loss and I know now is a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral like this. Whose funeral is it?"

　　The woman replied, "Well, the first hearse is for my husband."

　　"What happened to him?"

　　The woman replied, "My dog attacked and killed him."

　　The woman was even more inquisitive, "Well, who's in the second hearse?"

　　"My-mother-in law. She tried to help my husband when the dog turned on her and killed her too."

　　A poignant and thoughtful moment of silence passed between the two women.

　　"Could I borrow that dog?"

　　"Get in line."