爆笑英語笑話集錦

　　從古到今,笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調劑品”。笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆，在人們的日常生活中起著重要調劑作用。下面小編為大家帶來，歡迎大家閱讀!

　　1：

　　For her 82nd birthday，I surprised my grandmother with a birthday greeting signed by the President. ***Upon request，this service is available to seniors over 80.***When I asked grandma how she felt receiving a card from the White House，she had a ready answer. "There's no privacy in this country any more,"she said. "They even keep track of your birthday. "

　　我奶奶過82歲的生日時，我送給她一份驚奇的禮物—一張由總統簽名的生日賀卡。***根據規定，80歲以上的老年人可得到此項服務。***當我問奶奶收到來自白宮的賀卡有何感想時，她毫不猶豫地回答說:“在這個國家，再也沒有隱私了，他們就連你的生日都追蹤著。”

　　2：

　　A visitor to the zoo noticed one of the keepers sobbing quietly in a corner and on inquiry was told that the elephant had died.

　　一名參觀動物園的遊客注意到一名飼養員正躲在角落裡默默地哭泣。他問是怎麼回事，別人告訴他大象死了。

　　"Fond of him，was he?"the visitor asked.

　　“他很喜歡那頭大象，是吧?”遊客問道。

　　"It's not that,"came the reply. "He's the chap who has to dig the grave."

　　“並非如此，”那人回答說，“他負責給大象挖墓穴。”

　　3：

　　My teen-age son，Chad，and nine of his friends came home one night with newly pierced ears. When his grandmother heard about it，she asked him why he did it.”Peer

　　pressure," Chad told her.

　　一天晚上，我十幾歲的兒子查理，帶著九個朋友回到家，他們都紮了耳朵眼兒。當兒子的奶奶聽說了這件事時，她問我兒子為什麼要這樣做，查理告訴她:“是同輩的壓力。”

　　"You should be a leader instead of a follower，”Grandma said.

　　奶奶說：“你應該做個領頭的，”

　　"I was,"he replied. "It was my idea.”

　　“我是個領頭的。”他回答說：“這是我的主意。”

　　4：

　　Henry was from the United States and he had come to London for a holiday.

　　亨利是個美國人，他到倫敦來度假。

　　One day he was not feeling well, so he went to the clerk at the desk of his hotel and said,"I want to see doctor. Can you give me the name of a good one?"

　　有一天他感到身體不舒服，於是走到旅館服務檯對服務員說:“我想看病，你能給我推薦一位好醫生嗎?”

　　The clerk looked in a book and then said , "Dr. Kenneth Grey , 61010."

　　服務員查閱了一下本子，然後說:“肯尼思·格雷醫生，61010。"

　　Henry said，"Thank yon very much. Is he expensive?"

　　亨利說:“非常感謝，他收費貴嗎?”

　　"Well, "the clerk answered, "he always charges his patients two pounds for their first visit to him, and one pound and 50 pennies for later visits."

　　“喔，”服務員回答說:“他對初診患者收費兩英鎊，複診收費一點五英鎊。”

　　Henry decided to save 50 pennies, so when he went to see the doctor, he said，"I've come again,doctor."

　　亨利想節省五十便士，所以他去看病時對醫生說:“我又來了，醫生。”

　　For a few seconds the doctor looked at his face carefully without saying anything.

　　醫生仔細端詳著他的面孔，幾秒鐘沒說話。

　　Then he nodded and said，"Oh，yes. "He examined him and then said, "Everything's going as it should do. Just continue with the medicine I gave you last time."

　　然後點點頭說:“哦，是的。”給他做完檢查以後，醫生說:“病情發展正常。繼續服用上次我給你開的藥吧。”

　　以上就是小編為大家帶來的，希望大家喜歡!