短一些的英語笑話帶翻譯

　　笑話作為一種典型的幽默現象,對其進行系統的研究對於闡釋幽默現象具有舉足輕重的作用。本文是，希望對大家有幫助!

　　：Two hunters 兩個獵人

　　Once two hunters went hunting in the forest. One of them suddenly fell down by accident. He showed the whites of his eyes and seemed to have ceased breathing. The other hunter soon took out his mobile phone to call the emergency center for help. The operator said calmly:"First, you should make sure that he is already dead." Then the operator heard a gunshot from the other end of the phone and next he heard the hunter asking:"What should I do next?"

　　兩個獵人進森林裡打獵，其中一個獵人不慎跌倒，兩眼翻白，似已停止呼吸。 另一個獵人趕緊拿出手機撥通緊急求助電話。 接線員沉著地說：“第一步，要先確定你的朋友已經死亡。”於是，接線員在電話裡聽到一聲槍響，然後聽到那獵人接著問：“第二步怎辦?”

　　：That's what I want to find out

　　We have got a new dog, would you like to come around and play with him? Well, I don't know. Does he bite? That's what I want to find out.

　　我們又得到了一隻新狗，你要過來和他玩玩嗎? 哦， 我不知道。他咬人嗎? 這正是我想要知道的。

　　：Father and son 父與子

　　Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wifeuntil he marries her?

　　Dad: That happens in every country, son.

　　兒子：爸爸，聽說在非洲的一些地方男人在結婚前根本不認識他的妻子。

　　父親：孩子，實際上所有的國家都是這樣的。

　　：Keep feeding him nickels 再喂他幾枚五分鎳幣

　　A mother saw her three-year-old son put nickel in his mouth and swallowed it. She immediately picked hime up, turned him upside down and hit him on the back, whereupon he coughed up twodimes. Frantically***瘋狂似地*** , she called to the father outside.

　　"Your son just swallowed a nickel and coughed up two dimes! What shall I do?"

　　Yelled back the father, "Keep feeding him nickels!"

　　母親見三歲的兒子將一枚五分鎳幣放進嘴裡吞了下去，她立刻將他抱起，頭朝下不停地拍打他的後背，他咳出了兩枚一角的硬幣，她發狂似的朝正在外面的孩子父親喊道：

　　“你兒子剛才吞下了一枚五分鎳幣，可咳出兩枚一角的硬幣!我該怎麼辦呢?“

　　孩子他爸大聲回答道：“再喂他幾枚五分鎳幣!”

　　：Tonight I want to have some peace and quiet

　　"May I borrow your record player tonight?" a man asked his neighbour .

　　"Sure. Do you want to listen to some music?"

　　"No." he answered." Tonight I want to have some peace and quiet."

　　“今晚我可以借用以下你的唱機嗎?”一個人對他的鄰居說道。

　　“當然可以，你也想聽聽音樂嗎?”

　　“不，”他回答道，“今晚我想安安靜靜地休息一下。”

　　：A Nail Or A Fly? 釘子還是蒼蠅?

　　An old gentleman whose eyesight was failing came to stay in a hotel room with a bottle of wine in each hand. On the wall there was a fly which he took for a nail. So the moment he hung them on, the bottles fell broken and the wine spilt all over the floor.

　　When a waitress discovered what had happened, she showed deep sympathy***同情*** for him and decided to do him a favour.

　　So the next morning when he was out taking a walk in the roof garden, she hammered a nail exactly where the fly had stayed.

　　Now the old man entered his room. The smell of the spilt wine reminded him of the accident. When he looked up at the wall, he found the fly was there again! He walked to it carefully andslapped***拍擊*** it with all his strength.

　　On hearing a loud cry, the kind-hearted waitress rushed in. To her great surprise, the poor old man was there sitting on the floor, his teeth clenched***緊握的*** and his right hand bleeding!

　　一位視力正在衰退的老紳士住進了一家旅館的客房。他雙手各拿一瓶酒。在牆上有隻蒼蠅，他誤以為是枚釘子。他把兩隻瓶子朝上一掛，瓶子掉下來摔碎了，酒灑了一地。

　　一個女服務員發現發生的事情以後，對他深表同情，決定幫他個忙。

　　於是，第二天早上他到樓頂花園散步時，她把一枚釘子釘在了蒼蠅停過的地方。

　　這裡，老人回到了房裡。倒灑的酒味讓他想起了那件事。他抬頭往牆上一看，蒼蠅又停在了那兒!他輕手輕腳地走近，使盡全力拍了一掌。

　　聽到一聲大叫，好心的女服務員衝進房來。讓她大為吃驚的是，可憐的老頭正坐在地板上，牙關緊咬，右手滴血不止。