英語開心一刻幽默小笑話大全

　　笑話作為一種城市化的民間口頭創作體裁,是一種重要的交際手段。下面是小編帶來的英語開心一刻幽默小笑話，歡迎閱讀!

　　英語開心一刻幽默小笑話篇一

　　A farmer and his son, traveling by horse and buggy up a narrow lane, met a motorist going the other way. There was no room to pass for two miles in either direction. The motorist, in hurry, honked his horn .

　　"If you don't back up," said the farmer, rolling up his sleeves, I won't like what I'm going to have to do." The surprised driver put his car in reverse and backed up two miles, allowing the horse and buggy to go by. "What was it you wouldn't have liked to have done back there?" asked the farmer's son.

　　"Back up two miles," replied the farmer.

　　一位農夫和他的兒子乘坐輕便馬車來到一段窄路，他們遇到一個開車的人向相反的方向去。兩個方向的兩英里以內都沒有地方可以使他們相擦而過。駕車人甚是著急，按響了喇叭。 “如果你不後退，”農夫說著擼起了袖子，“我可不喜歡我將不得不做的事。”司機吃驚不小，掛上倒擋，向後退了兩英里，讓輕便馬車先過去。

　　“剛才在那兒你說過的你不喜歡要做的事是什麼?”農夫的兒子問道。

　　“退後兩英里，”農夫回答道。

　　英語開心一刻幽默小笑話篇二

　　roast pig

　　A gentleman was invited for dinner. When he hurried there and sat down, he was happy to see a roast pig in front of his seat:"Not bad, I am next to the pig." But then he noticed the angry fat lady sitting next to him. He faked a smile and added: "Oh I am sorry, I meant the roasted one on the table."

　　烤乳豬

　　一位先生去赴宴遲到了，匆忙入座後，發現自己的座位正對著乳豬，於是大為高興的說：“還不錯，我坐在乳豬的旁邊。”這時才發現身旁的一位胖女士正怒目相視，他忙陪笑改口到：“對不起，我說的是那隻烤好的。”

　　英語開心一刻幽默小笑話篇三

　　“S-A-L-E.***處理品***”

　　About two weeks before our fifth anniversary, my husband ased me what I would like for a gift. I told him I wanted something impractical1 and romantic.

　　On our anniversary, he presented me with a lovely gold bracelet2. "A little four-letter word made me get this for you," he said softly.

　　"Oh, how sweet," I whispered. "L-O-V-E?"

　　"No," he replied. "S-A-L-E."

　　我們結婚五週年前大約兩週時，我丈夫問我喜歡什麼禮物。我告訴他我要那些沒有實用價值卻又富於浪漫色彩的。

　　在我們的週年紀念日那天，他向我展示了一副可愛的金手鐲。“一個小小的四字詞，讓我為你買了這個。”他溫和地說。

　　“哦，多甜蜜。”我耳語他。“L-O-V-E***愛***?”

　　“不對，”他回答。“S-A-L-E.***處理品***”

　　英語開心一刻幽默小笑話篇四

　　那不是我的孩子，那是我丈夫

　　"Did the children behave when you bathed them?" inquired the mistress to the new French nurse, when she returned home from the party.

　　"All but the biggest boy? We have only one boy, Freddy, and he's only two years old."

　　"Which biggest boy? We have only one boy, Freddy, and he is only two years old."

　　"It is not little Freddy, I mean. It is the big boy with glasses and curly hair."

　　"Good gracious! That's not my boy, that's my husband."

　　“你給孩子們洗澡的時候他們規矩不規矩?” 一位女士從宴會回家後對一名法國護士詢問道。

　　“除了那個最大的男孩，其他表現都很好。在我把他放到水裡之前，他又鬧又踹。”護士回答道。

　　“哪個最大的男孩?我們只有一個男孩，弗雷德，他只有兩歲。”

　　“不是小弗雷德，我是說那個戴著眼鏡卷頭髮的大男孩。”“老天，那不是我的孩子，那是我丈夫。”

　　英語開心一刻幽默小笑話篇五

　　逍遙自在地享清福

　　round and round Lao wang rested under the tree, Lao li came up and said, "hey, why not go up the hill cutting wood?" Pharaoh said: "cut wood stem what?" Lao li said: "good money! Sold into money can buy a donkey, then along home door-to-door selling wood. Zheng money will buy trucks, and then buy wood factory sells wooden ware, buy more trucks, so that you can be really rich." The old king: "fortune"? Lao li answer: "fortune can be to free and unfettered freely do well." Pharaoh said, "that you think I doing now?"

　　周而復始 老王在樹下休息，老李走過來對他說：“嗨，為什麼不去上山砍柴?” 老王說：“砍柴幹什麼?” 老李說：“好賣錢啊。賣到錢就可以買驢，再沿家挨戶賣柴。掙了錢就再 買卡車，然後買木廠賣木 器，再買更多的卡車，那樣就可以發大財了。” 老王問：“發了財幹什麼?” 老李答：“發了財就可以逍遙自在地享清福嘛。” 老王說：“那你以為我現在在幹什麼?”