英語簡短小笑話帶翻譯

　　幽默和笑語都屬於文體之一,它們的共同特點在對生活的不合理現象和乖繆不通進行批評和嘲諷。下面是小編帶來的，歡迎閱讀!

　　篇一

　　Once two hunters went hunting in the forest. One of them suddenly fell down by accident. He showed the whites of his eyes and seemed to have ceased breathing.

　　The other hunter soon took out his mobile phone to call the emergency center for help.

　　The operator said calmly:"First, you should make sure that he is already dead."

　　Then the operator heard a gunshot from the other end of the phone and next he heard the hunter asking:"What should I do next?"

　　兩個獵人進森林裡打獵，其中一個獵人不慎跌倒，兩眼翻白，似已停止呼吸。

　　另一個獵人趕緊拿出手機撥通緊急求助電話。

　　接線員沉著地說：“第一步，要先確定你的朋友已經死亡。”於是，接線員在電話裡聽到一聲槍響，然後聽到那獵人接著問：“第二步怎辦?”

　　篇二

　　Teacher: Walter, why don't you wash your face? I can see what you had for breakfast this morning.

　　Walter: What was it?

　　Teacher: Eggs.

　　Walter: Wrong. That was yesterday.

　　老師：沃爾特，你為什麼不洗臉?我看得出你今天早飯吃了什麼。

　　沃爾特：我吃了什麼?

　　老師：雞蛋。

　　沃爾特：錯了，老師。那是昨天吃的。

　　篇三

　　The Cemetery Shortcut

　　為抄近路走墓地

　　Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs.

　　萬聖節派對過後，兩男人圖個樂呵，打算抄近路穿過墓地回家。

　　Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.

　　走到墓地中央時，他們被從迷霧中傳來的“答、答、答”聲驚嚇到了。

　　Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

　　正當兩人害怕得渾身顫抖時，他們看到是個老頭拿著鐵錘和鑿子，在一塊墓石上鑿著什麼。

　　"Holy cow, Mister," one of them said after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death -- we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?"

　　“哇塞，先生，”其中一人喘了口氣說，“你把我們嚇得半死啊，我們還以為遇上鬼了呢!那麼晚了你在這裡做什麼?”

　　"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!"

　　“那幫白痴!”老頭抱怨道，“他們把我名字拼錯啦!”

　　篇四

　　Before the final examination, Tom told his mother, "Mom, I had a dream last night that I'd passed today's exam.""Don't trust dreams, dear. It is said what you experience in dreams usually turns out to be the opposite." Mother replied."Then I do hope I'll fail the other subjects in my dream tonight," Tom said.

　　在期末考試之前，湯姆告訴他的母親：“媽媽，我昨天晚上做了一個夢，夢見我通過了今天的考試。”“不要相信夢，親愛的。據說夢中的經歷通常與現實相反。”媽媽答道。“那麼，我真希望在今晚的夢中，我的其他功課都不及格。”湯姆說。

　　篇五

　　A Good Boy

　　Little Robert asked his mother for two cents.

　　"What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

　　"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

　　"You’re a good boy," said the mother proudly.

　　"Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

　　"She is the one who sells the candy."

　　好孩子

　　小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。

　　”昨天給你的錢幹什麼了?“

　　”我給了一個可憐的老太婆，“他回答說。

　　”你真是個好孩子，“媽媽驕傲地說。“再給你兩分錢。可你為什麼對那位老太太那麼感興趣呢?”

　　“她是個賣糖果的。”