超短爆笑的英語笑話大全

　　笑話是民族文化及社會生活中不可缺少的一環,從古至今都擁有廣大的受眾,深受人們喜愛。本文是超短爆笑的英語笑話，希望對大家有幫助!

　　超短爆笑的英語笑話篇一

　　Good excuse 巧妙的藉口

　　Police officers hear plenty of excuses from people caught parking only for the handicapped1 persons.

　　Once a policeman stopped a man for doing so. When the man was questioned if he knew the parking regulations. He answered correctly. Then the policeman further questioned why he was parking his car there.

　　"Oh, I injured my leg last week. The doctor said I would become disabled if I didn't get proper treatment. Now I'm experiencing what I feel like to be an disabled person."

　　當那些正常人因把車錯停在專供殘疾人用的停車位而被警察抓到時，他們總是能找到各種各樣的藉口。

　　一次，一個警察阻止一個人把車停在殘疾人的專用位上。當警察問他是否知道這個停車的規定時，他說她知道。然後警察接著問他為什麼還故意把車停在那兒。

　　那人回答說：“哦，上星期我摔傷了腿，大夫說，如果我不很好治療，我就會變殘疾，現在我想先體驗一下作個殘疾人是什麼滋味。”

　　超短爆笑的英語笑話篇二

　　An unexpected call 意想不到的電話

　　Mrs. Brown dialed her daughter's number and sang out, "Hello, darling. How are you?"

　　"Terrible, Mom. My back is killing1 me, the children are acting2 up, the house is a mess…and I'm expecting guest for dinner."

　　"Don't worry, darling. I'm coming right over. I'll feed the kids, clean up your place, and cook a dinner your guests will never forget."

　　You're an angel! How is Dad?"

　　"Dad? Sweetheart, you know Daddy died nine years ago."

　　Pause. "What number are you calling? Hold on? Please!" the voice wailed3. "Does this mean you are not coming over?"

　　布朗夫人給她女兒撥了個電話，然後高興地說：”哎，親愛的，你好嗎?“

　　“太糟了， 媽媽。我的腰疼得很厲害。孩子們一直在鬧，房子裡亂七八糟的，我還要為六為客人準備晚餐。”

　　“親愛的，彆著急，我馬上就來。我會把孩子們餵飽，清理好房子，然後給客人們做一頓難以忘懷的晚餐。“

　　“你真是個救命的菩薩，爸爸怎麼樣?“

　　“你爸爸?親愛的，你這是怎麼啦?你爸爸九年前就死了呀?”

　　沉默了一會，“您是不是撥錯了電話?請別掛上，”那個聲音變的有氣無力了，“是不是這就意味著您不會來啦?”

　　超短爆笑的英語笑話篇三

　　A hasty retreat 快速逃命

　　After a week's absence, a mountain man staggered1 home, clothes torn, shoes worn thin. He was exhausted2.

　　"Where have you been?" asked his wife.

　　"I went out in the woods to check the still." Replied the mountain man, "and a giant bear stepped out in front of me. I took off running ahead of him and finally lost him. I never ran so fast in my life."

　　"But that was a week ago." Said the wife. "Where have you been since?"

　　The mountain man collapsed3 in a chair. "Walking back."

　　離開家一個星期後，那個登山人搖搖晃晃地回到了家，他的衣服也破了，鞋底也磨薄了，他本人更是疲憊不堪的樣子。

　　“你到哪兒去了?”老婆問。

　　“那天我到森林裡去檢查有無無非法釀酒的地方，”登山人敘述著，“忽然一隻大熊出現在我的面前，我拔腿就跑，熊就在後面追，好不容易才把它甩掉，我這輩子從來沒有跑這麼快。”

　　“可是那是一週前的事了，”他老婆說：“後來你到哪兒去了?”

　　登山人癱在在椅子上說：“往回走啊!”