高中英語好笑笑話帶翻譯

　　漢字的“冷”說明了漢語冷笑話的特性,即用一種不合邏輯荒謬的推理來娛樂大眾。下面小編整理了，希望大家喜歡!

　　摘抄

　　考你的推理能力

　　Four friends live in a small town. Their names are John, Miller, Smith and Carte. They all havedifferent jobs. One is a policeman, one is a cook, one is a farmer, and one is a doctor.

　　It's Tuesday afternoon. John's son breaks his leg and John takes him to the doctor. Thedoctor's sister is Smith's wife. The farmer isn't married. He has a lot of hens.

　　Miller often buys eggs from the farmer. The policeman sees Smith and Miller every day for theyare neighbours.

　　Now who is the policeman? Who is the cook? Who is the farmer? Who is the doctor?

　　1. John is a _______.

　　A. doctor B. farmer C. policeman D. cook

　　2. Miller is a _______.

　　A. doctor B. policeman C. cook D. farmer

　　3. Smith is a _______.

　　A. farmer B. policeman C. cook D. doctor

　　4. Carter is a _______.

　　A. doctor B. policeman C. cook D. farmer

　　【答案與解析】這是一篇推理性文章，要求根據所給出提示，猜出各自的職業。

　　以上4題答案分別為C、A、C、D。有一定難度，且需要一定的推理，現分析如下：

　　1. 因為John 的兒子腿摔斷了要去看醫生，故可推知John不是doctor。

　　2. 因為醫生的妹妹是Smith的妻子，故Smith不是doctor***否則兄妹結婚，不合情理***。

　　3. 由於 farmer 沒有結婚，所以 Smith 和 John 都不是farmer ***因為Smith 有妻子，John 有兒子***。

　　4. 因為警察每天看到Smith，所以 Smith不是policeman。

　　5. 由以上分析可知，Smith 不是 doctor，也不是 farmer，也不是 policeman，所以只能是 cook。

　　6. 由於 Miller常從farmer 處買雞蛋，所以 Miller 不是 farmer。

　　7. 由以上分析可知，John, Miller 和 Smith 都不是 farmer，所以 Carter 一定是farmer。

　　8. 由於警察每天除看到 Smith 外，還看到 Miller，所以 Miller 不是警察。既然他不是警察，而且前面已分析出 Smith 是 cook，Carter 是 farmer，所以 Miller 一定是 doctor。

　　9. 最後剩下的 John 便是policeman。

　　鑑賞

　　洗蘋果的有效方法

　　A Useful Way

　　Father: Jack, why do you drink so much water?

　　Jack: I have just had an apple, Dad.

　　Father: What's that got to do with it?

　　Jack: I forgot to wash the apple.

　　爸爸：傑克，你幹嘛喝這麼多水呀?

　　傑克：我剛才吃了個蘋果，爸爸。

　　爸爸：可是這跟喝水有什麼關係呢?

　　傑克：我忘了洗蘋果呀。

　　賞析

　　傳教士買鸚鵡

　　A preacher is buying a parrot

　　"Are you sure it doesnt scream, yell, or swear? "asked the preacher.

　　"Oh absolutely. Its a religious parrot, "the storekeeper assures him.

　　"Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lordsprayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm."

　　"Wonderful! says the preacher, but what happens if you pull both strings?"

　　"I fall off my perch, you stupid fool!" screeched the parrot.

　　一個傳教士在買鸚鵡。

　　“你確信它不會尖叫，大叫或詛咒別人嗎?”傳教士問。

　　“哦，絕對不會。它是一隻虔誠的鸚鵡。”店主保證說。

　　“你看見它腿上的這些細繩了嗎?當你拉動右面的這根，它會背誦天主經，當你拉動左面的那根，它會背誦讚美詩。”

　　“太棒了!”傳教士說，“但是如果我同時拉動兩條繩子，會發生什麼呢?”

　　“我會從樹幹上掉下去的，你這個笨蛋!”鸚鵡尖聲說道。

　　欣賞

　　Your Coat Is on Fire

　　您的大衣著火了

　　The master, to impress on his pupils the need of thinking before speaking, told them to countfifty before saying anything important, and one hundred if it was very important.

　　老師為了讓學生記住先思考後發言，告訴他們在說出重要事情之前先數到50，如果是特別重要的事情，要先數到100。

　　The next day he was speaking, standing with his back to the fire, when he noticed several lipsmoving rapidly. Suddenly the whole class shouted: Ninety-eight, ninety-nine, a hundred. Yourcoat is on fire, sir!

　　第二天，當老師背靠著火爐講課時，發現好幾個學生的嘴脣在很快地不停地動。突然，全班學生一起喊道：“九十八，九十九，一百。老師，您的大衣著火了!”