英語笑話爆笑超級搞笑的

　　下面是小編整理的一些關於there be在英語中的特殊用法， 希望大家喜歡。

　　英語爆笑笑話一：三人同舟

　　Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines and reeled in their catch.

　　A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle and asked the man in the middle if he knew the other two.

　　"Oh yes, " he said. "They are my friends.

　　"In that case, " warned the officer, "you'd better get them out of here!"

　　"Yes, sir, " the man replied, and he began rowing furiously.

　　三位男子在公園的長椅上坐著。中間的一個在讀報紙，另外兩個在假裝釣魚。他們給想象的魚鉤上魚餌，放線，並卷線把魚抓上來。

　　一位過路警察駐足觀察了這個景象，他問中間的那個男子是否認識其他兩位。

　　“喔，認識，”他說，“他們是我的朋友。”

　　“那樣的話，”警察告誡說，“你最好把他們從這裡弄走。”

　　“好的，警官。”那男子回答說，接著就開始瘋狂般地做起划槳的動作來。

　　英語爆笑笑話二：As If Awakening From A Dream

　　A competition which subject is on giving up drinking is proceeding. One of lecturers says excitedly, " Alcohol can break down conjugal***婚姻的*** relation, even cause your wife to leave you… "

　　A man shouts out at the news, "Give me another bottle of Brandy."

　　以戒酒為主題的演講比賽正在進行，一個演講者動情地說：“酒精可以破壞夫妻關係，甚至導致妻子離開自己的丈夫……”

　　這時一個男人大聲喊：“再來一瓶白蘭地!”

　　英語爆笑笑話三：離婚

　　A husband and wife,both 91,stood before a judge,asking for a divorce."I don't understand,"He said,"Why do you want a divorce at this time of life?"

　　the husband explained "Well , you see,We wanted to wait until the children died."

　　有一個丈夫和妻子都是91歲，他們站在法官面前，要求離婚。“我不明白，”法官說，“你們為什麼到了這把年紀還要離婚?”

　　丈夫解釋道：“嗯，你是知道的，我們以前是喲等到孩子們都死了。”

　　英語爆笑笑話四：I do not recognize you

　　Walking on the beach one day he saw a crab1, went to see what happens, suddenly crab pincers***鉗子*** folder2, then crab bush run. Tiger jumped the pain, followed by the recovery of crabs3!

　　Catch up with no trees on the crab, and then to see a tiger in Shou Network spiders, tiger angry at Spider: Good you a crab! Do you think you posted on the Web and I do not recognize you!

　　一天老虎在沙灘散步，見到一隻螃蟹，就走過去想看個究竟，突然被螃蟹的鉗子夾了一下，螃蟹拔腿就往樹叢裡跑。老虎痛得跳起來了，緊接著就追螃蟹!

　　追到樹叢就不見螃蟹了，這時老虎看見一隻守在大網中的蜘蛛，老虎對著蜘蛛發火了：好你個螃蟹!你以為你上了網我就不認得你了!

　　英語爆笑笑話五：A Smart Parrot 聰明的鸚鵡

　　A curious guy goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. There he sees a parrot with a red string tied to its left leg and a green string tied to it's right leg. He asks the owner the significance of the strings1. "Well, this is a highly trained parrot. If you pull the red string he speaks French; if you pull the green string he speaks German," replies the shop keeper.

　　"And what happens if I pull both the strings?" our curious shopper inquires.

　　"I fall off my perch2 you fool!!" screeches3 the parrot.

　　有個人去寵物店買鸚鵡。在那裡，他看見有隻鸚鵡的左腿被紅線繫住，右腿則被綠線繫住。對此他感到不解，於是他問該店的老闆，老闆回答說：“這隻鸚鵡受過特殊的訓練。如果拉紅線，它就講法語，拉綠線，它則講德語。”

　　這個好奇的人接著問，“要是我兩條線都拉，會怎麼樣呢?”

　　“我就會掉下來了，你這個傻瓜!!”鸚鵡尖叫著說。