關於幽默英文小笑話大全

　　網際網路不僅是我們生活中不可缺少的，而且也是我們工作學習之餘緩解壓力、舒緩情緒的重要渠道。正是由於我們有這樣的需要，網路笑話得以繁榮興盛。本文是關於幽默英文小笑話，希望對大家有幫助!

　　關於幽默英文小笑話：Doctor's Wife

　　A doctor and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast. "You aren't so good in bed either!" he shouted and stormed off to work. By midmorning, he decided he'd better makeamends and phoned home. After many rings, his wife picked up the phone. "What took you so long to answer?" "I was in bed." "What were you doing in bed this late?" "Getting a second opinion."

　　關於幽默英文小笑話：Blind Date

　　A young playboy took a blind date to an amusement park. They went for a ride on the Ferris wheel. The ride completed, she seemed rather bored.

　　"What would you like to do next?" he asked.

　　"I wanna be weighed," she said.

　　So the young man took her over to the weight guesser.

　　"One-twelve," said the man at the scale, and he was absolutely right. Next they rode the roller coaster. After that, he bought her some popcorn and cotton candy, then he asked what else she would like to do.

　　"I wanna be weighed," she said.

　　He really latched onto a square one tonight, thought the young man, and using the excuse he had developed a headache, he took the girl home. The girl's mother was surprised to see her home so early, and asked, "What's wrong, dear, didn't you have a nice time tonight?"

　　"Wousy," said the girl.

　　關於幽默英文小笑話：Bingo Winner

　　This guy had a very attractive wife, who was always wanting clothes, jewelry, etc., but he was not too well off.

　　One day his wife came home with a diamond neckless. The guy asked: "Where did you get that?"

　　His wife replied: "I won it at bingo."

　　The next night she came home with a mink coat. The guy asked: "Where did you get that?"

　　His wife replied: "I won it at bingo."

　　The next night she came home with a Mercedes Benz. The guy asked: "Where did you get that?"

　　His wife replied: "I won it at bingo. Please go upstairs and run my bath for me."

　　His wife came upstairs to find a very small amount of water in the tub.

　　The wife asked: "How come you put so little water in the tub?"

　　The guy replied: "I didn't want you to wet your bingo card".

　　關於幽默英文小笑話：Slow Driver

　　Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!" So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over.

　　Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies -- two in the front seat and three in the back - eyes wide and white as ghosts.

　　The driver, obviously confused, says to him, "Officer, I don't understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?"

　　"Ma'am," the officer replies, "You weren't speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers."

　　"Slower than the speed limit?" she asked. No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly... Twenty-Two miles an hour!" the old woman says a bit proudly. The State Police officer, trying to contain achuckle explains to her that "22" was the route number, not the speed limit. A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out her error.

　　"But before I let you go, Ma'am, I have to ask... Is everyone in this car ok? These women seemawfully shaken and they haven't muttered a single peep this whole time." the officer asks.

　　"Oh, they'll be alright in a minute officer. We just got off Route 119."

　　關於幽默英文小笑話：The Carburettor

　　"The car won't start," aid a wife to her husband. "I think there's water in the carburettor."

　　"How do you know?" said the husband scornfully. "You don't even know what the carburettor is."

　　"I'm telling you," repeated the wife, "I'm sure there's water in the carburettor."

　　"We'll see," mocked the husband. "Let me check it out. Where's the car?"

　　"In the swimming pool."