關於英語冷笑話故事精選

　　英語笑話是幽默的語言表達，它是一種常見的幽默傳達方式。小編精心收集了關於英語冷笑話故事，供大家欣賞學習!

　　關於英語冷笑話故事：My Boss and I

　　When I take a long time, I am slow.

　　When my boss takes a long time, he is thorough.

　　When I don't do it, I am lazy.

　　When my boss doesn't do it, he is too busy.

　　When I do something without being told, I am trying to be smart.

　　When my boss does the same, that is initiative.

　　When I please my boss, I am ass-kissing.

　　When my boss pleases his boss, he is co-operating.

　　I do good, my boss never remembers.

　　When I do wrong, he never forgets.

　　老闆和我

　　我做事情花了長時間，是效率低;

　　老闆做事情花了長時間，是深思熟慮。

　　我沒有做完事情，是懶惰;

　　老闆沒有做完事情，是太繁忙。

　　沒有人告訴我的事情我做了，是自作聰明;

　　老闆做了同樣的事情，是首創。

　　我取悅老闆，是獻媚;

　　老闆取悅他的老闆，是合作。

　　我幹得好，老闆從來不會想起;

　　我幹得不好，老闆從來不會忘記。

　　關於英語冷笑話故事：Frog

　　The science teacher lecturing his class in biology said, "Now I'll show you this frog in my pocket." He then reached into his pocket and pulled out a chicken sandwich. He looked puzzled for a second, thought deeply, and said "That's funny. I distinctly remember eating my lunch."

　　青蛙

　　老師正在給學生上生物課：“現在，我將要給你們看我袋子裡的這隻青蛙。”接著，他把手伸進口袋，卻拿出了一份雞肉三文治。老師滿臉困惑地看了一眼，沉思了一會兒，說道：“真奇怪。我明明記得我已經把午飯吃掉了。”

　　關於英語冷笑話故事：The Bad News and the Terrible News

　　Michael sat in his attorney's office. "Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?" the lawyer asked.

　　"Give me the bad news first."

　　"Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars."

　　"That's the bad news?" asked Michael incredulously. "I can't wait to hear the terrible news."

　　"The terrible news is that it's of you and your secretary."

　　壞訊息和可怕的訊息

　　邁克爾坐在律師的辦公室裡。“您想先知道壞訊息還是可怕的訊息?”律師問。

　　“先告訴我壞訊息吧。”

　　“您的妻子發現了一張價值50萬美元的照片。”

　　“那就是壞訊息?”邁克爾滿腹懷疑，“我要等不及聽那個可怕的訊息了。”

　　“那可怕的訊息就是那是一張您和祕書的照片。”

　　關於英語冷笑話故事：Elephant Time

　　A young man is wandering around the zoo looking at the animals. He suddenly remembers about an appointment that he scheduled. Unfortunately, he forgot his watch. He searchs for someone who could give him the time.

　　He sees a zoo keeper standing next to an elephant. "Excuse me, sir," says the young man "Do you know what time it is?"

　　The zoo keeper reaches under the elephant, grabs his balls and starts playing with them.

　　"Mmmmm, it is about 3:00," the zoo keeper responds.

　　The young man looks at him in awe, "How did you know that?" The zoo keeper looks back at the man, "I looked at the clock on the wall right behind you."

　　關於英語冷笑話故事：The Day that You're Inaugurated

　　A woman and her husband were out shopping when she realized that she needed to purchase some hair color for her graying hair.

　　"When are you going to stop buying that expensive stuff," complained the husband, "and let your hair go gray like Barbara Bush?"

　　"The day that you're inaugurated," the wife replied.

　　在你宣誓就職的那天

　　一個婦人正和丈夫在外面購物，她想起來需要為自己漸漸變白的頭髮買一些染髮劑。“你什麼時候才會停止購買這些昂貴的東西，”丈夫抱怨說：“而讓你的頭髮自然變白，就像巴巴拉布什那樣呢?”

　　“在你宣誓就職的那天。”妻子回答道。