關於短英語笑話閱讀大全

　　笑話是一種頗受人們喜愛的民間敘事型別,材料豐富,有廣泛的現實基礎。小編整理了關於短英語笑話，歡迎閱讀!

　　關於短英語笑話：Don't Kick

　　The little farm boy storms out of the house, mad about being ordered to do his chores. In the barnyard, he kicks the rooster. Near the barn, he kicked a hog. In the corral, he kicked the family's milk cow. His mother saw all this and stormed out after him.

　　"I saw you kick that rooster; just for that, you'll get no eggs. And I saw you kick that hog; just for that, you'll get no bacon. And I saw you kick the cow; just for that, you'll get no milk!"

　　His father heard the yelling, came out of the barn, tripping over the cat and nearly falling, after which, he booted the poor animal out of his way. The cat ran screeching into the barn.

　　The little boy looked up at his mother and said, "You want to tell him or shall I?"

　　關於短英語笑話：I Know The Truth

　　At school, Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults hide at least one dark secret and this makes it very easy to blackmail them merely by saying, "I know the whole truth."

　　So Little Johnny decides to try it out. When he arrives home from school that day, he says to his mother, "I know the whole truth." His mother looks shocked, quickly finds $20, and gives it to him, saying, "Just don't tell your father."

　　Quite pleased, Little Johnny waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." His father looks shocked, quickly finds $40, and gives it to him, saying, "Just don't tell your mother."

　　The next morning, Little Johnny is on his way to school when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy decides to try again. "I know the whole truth."

　　The mailman drops his mailbag, throws opens his arms, and says, "Then come give your real daddy a nice big hug!"

　　關於短英語笑話：My Father's The Best

　　Three boys were bragging about their fathers. The first one said, "My father runs so fast he can fire an arrow, start running, and get there before the arrow!"

　　The second one said, "That's nothing! My father can shoot a gun, start running, and get there before the bullet!"

　　The third boy just smiled. "That's nothing. My father is a civil servant. He gets off work at 5 and is home before 4!"

　　關於短英語笑話：Gifts For Your Teacher

　　On the last day of kindergarten, the children brought presents for their teacher.

　　The florist's son gave her a box. She hook it, held it up, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Is it flowers?"

　　"That's right!" said the boy.

　　Then the candy store owner's son gave her his package. She shook it, held it up, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Is it a box of candy?"

　　"That's right!" said the boy.

　　Next the liquor store owner's son handed her his box.

　　She shook it, held it up, and noticed that it was leaking. She touched a drop with her finger and tasted it. "I bet I know what it is. Is it wine?"

　　"No," said the boy.

　　She touched another drop to her tongue. "Is it Champagne?"

　　"No," said the boy.

　　"I give up. What is it?"

　　The boy grinned. "A puppy!"

　　關於短英語笑話：Jimmy's Not Stupid

　　Mrs. White asked her 4th grade class if they thought they were stupid and, if so, to please stand.

　　Little Jimmy stood up, alone.

　　Mrs. White said, "Jimmy, do you really think you're stupid?"

　　"No," Jimmy said. "But I didn't want you standing up there alone."