爆笑英語笑話短文精選

　　開心是福氣，開心是解脫，開心是享受，開心是心態，開心要分享。多看笑話，就可以讓我們多開心一下。小編精心收集了爆笑英語笑話短文，供大家欣賞學習!

　　爆笑英語笑話短文：Make a Wish

　　許個願吧!

　　Every morning on his way to work, a business man passed a house where he saw a woman beating her looy on the head with a loaf of bread.

　　每天早晨一位商人在上班途中都會經過一戶人家，他總是看見一個女人用一條麵包打她兒子的頭部。

　　But on this particular day, he noticed that she was hitting him with a piece of chocolate cake.

　　但今天卻比較特別，他發現她正用一塊巧克力蛋糕打他的頭。

　　Unable to restrain his curiosity, he rang the doorbell and the woman answere .

　　他忍不住好奇，便按了那戶人家的門鈴。女人聽了鈴聲，出來開門。

　　"Madam, I couldn't help but notice that every day you beat your child with a loaf of bread. . . "

　　“這位太太，每天經過這裡我都忍不住會注意到你用一條麵包打你兒子……”

　　"That's true ."

　　"那倒是不假……"

　　"And yet today I observed that you were hitting him with a piece of chocolate cake. ',

　　"可是今天我卻看見你用一塊巧克力蛋糕打他。"

　　“Well, today's his birthday. ”

　　“今天是他生日嘛。”

　　爆笑英語笑話短文：True Dedication

　　好投入啊!

　　Mrs. Fortesque was getting more and more worried.

　　福特斯克太太越來越擔心，

　　Her husband had left for a round of golf early in the morning and by mid-afternoon he still wasn't home.

　　因為她先生一早出去打高爾夫球，到下午三四點都還沒回家，

　　Evening came and Mr.Fortesque still hadn't returned.

　　甚至到傍晚也還不見人影。

　　The lady was just about to call the police when she heard her husband's car pulling into the drive way,

　　福特斯克太太正要打電話報警就聽到她先生開車回來了。

　　Rushing outside, she told her husband, "Darling, I was so worried about you. What kept you?"

　　她衝出門外，向她先生說道："親愛的，我一整天都在擔心你，是什麼事把你耽擱了?"

　　"Charlie had a heart attack on the fourth hole."

　　“查理在第四洞時心臟病發作。”

　　"Oh, my goodness, that's terrible!"

　　“喔，天哪，真可怕!”

　　"You're telling me! All day long it was shoot the ball, drag Charlie, shoot the ball, drag Charlie . . . . "

　　“那還用你說嗎!-整天我都一邊打球，一邊拉查理，一會兒打球，一會兒拖查理，……

　　爆笑英語笑話短文：介詞問題

　　A new student was just finding his way around Harvard University.

　　一位哈佛大學新生正在熟悉校園環境。

　　"Excuse me," he aske an upperclassman, "can you tell me where the library's at?"

　　“對不起，”他問一位高年級學長，“您能告訴我圖書館在哪裡嗎?”

　　"What appalling diction," sneered the older student. "I can't imagine how you could have been admitted to Harvard.

　　“好可怕的用字喔!”那名學長嘲弄他道。

　　Don' t you know better than to end a sentence with a preposition?"

　　"不知道你老弟是怎麼獲准進入哈佛的。難道你不知道介詞不要放在一個句子後面嗎?"

　　"OK. Can you tell me where the library's at, asshole?"

　　“好吧!你能告訴我圖書館在哪裡嗎，驢蛋?”