讓人狂笑不止的英語笑話

　　笑話,是民間文學中的一朵奇葩,具有語言詼諧、故事生動、短小精悍的特點。下面是小編帶來的，歡迎閱讀!

　　篇一

　　Feedback

　　反應

　　A motorist got caught in one of those new radar traps.He had been driving home one night when the automatic camera identified his car as exceeding the speed limit, Soon after，he received a ticket in the mail，plus a picture of this vehicle with the date and speed recorded on it.

　　一個飛車手被新的雷達測速儀捕獲。那是他在一天晚上超速駕車回家時，被自動照像機攝下了他的汽車。不久，他便收到了一個裝有***單的信封，裡面裝有他汽車的照片、超速的日期和速度。

　　Duly impressed, he sent back the ticket, along with a photo of a $100 bill to pay the fine.

　　他對這種方式的印象極為深刻，於是寄回了那張***單，並附上了一張一百元美金的照片作為罰金。

　　篇二

　　Fame and hardwork

　　名聲與艱苦勞動

　　During the Gulf War，my sister，Jane，bought a flag and asked her apartment's maintenance man, a Vietnam vet，to install a pole for him. When she offered to pay him,he told her there was no way he could take money for putting up the American flag.

　　海灣戰爭期間，我妹妹珍妮買了一面美國國旗，她請房子的維修工—一位越戰的老兵給她豎一根旗杆。當我妹妹為此什給他錢時，他說，他幫助掛美國國旗，無論如何都不該收錢。

　　Jane contacted her local newspaper，and they published an article about the incident. The next time she encountered the maintenance man, he told her that everyone he knew had read her story and that she had made him a celebrity.Jane jokingly asked for his autograph.

　　珍妮來到當地報杜，就此事在報上發表了一篇文章。當珍妮第二次碰到那位維修工時，他對珍妮說他所認識的人都她寫的報章，是她使他成為了名人。珍妮開玩笑地說讓他給籤個名。

　　"I don't have time,"the man replied. "I'm too busy setting up American flags.”

　　他回答說:“那我可沒時間，掛美國國旗的事忙得我不可開交。”

　　篇三

　　獨自在家

　　My wife will go to any extreme to keep people from,knowing she is home alone. One evening when I was working late，my wife heard a knock on the door. She ignosed it,but the knocing continued. Frantic，sloe began to bark,softly at first，then louder and louder. Much to her relief,the knocking soon stopped.

　　我妻子獨自在家時，總是不想讓別人知道家裡沒有其他的人。一天晚上，我工作到很晚。我妻子聽到有人敲門，她就沒理，但敲門的聲音總是不停，慌亂之中，她開始學狗叫。一開始她低聲地叫，隨後她的叫聲越來越大。敲門聲很快地停了，她這才鬆了口氣。

　　The next day the paper boy came to the door to collect."I came by last night,"he told me,"but I left when your wife barked at me!"

　　第二天，送報的小孩來我家收錢，那小孩告訴我:“我昨晚上就來了，你老婆老衝我學狗叫，我就走了。”

　　篇四

　　善解人意

　　I had iust learned to drive and, like most teen-agers，begged at every opportunity to take over the wheel. During a family vacation my father finally allowed me drive on a long，straight stretch on highway.I was in my glory until there was a sudden turn in the road.Caught unaware, I swung too wide and ran into a service station's advertising sign. I stopped the cat and waited for a lecture.

　　像大多數的青少年一樣，我剛學會開車時，總想利用一切開車的機會。有一次家庭外出度假時，我經過請求，爸爸終於允許我在筆直的高速公路止駕駛。我感到十分榮幸，直到開到了一個急轉彎，由於轉盤轉動得太大，車直奔著加油站的廣告牌衝去。我停下了車，等著挨訓。

　　My father，always considerate of his children's feelings，turned back to the rest of family and said. "As long as we're here,does anyone need to use the rest room?"

　　我的父親總是考慮到孩子喲情緒，轉過身對家裡的其他人說:“既然我們已經把車開到了這兒，有人想上廁所嗎?”

　　篇五

　　只是提醒而已!

　　Trying to cut down on expenses，I decided to bring a sack lunch towork. Unfortunately, I kept forgetting my sandwiches in my morning rush. One night I left myself a note near the front door.

　　為了減少開支，我決定工作時自帶午餐。不幸的是，在早上的忙亂中我總是忘了帶事先準備的三明治。一天晚上，我在前門上給自己貼了個紙條。

　　Next morning I spotted the message and went to the refrigerator, but my lunch wasn't there. I retraced my steps and took a closer look at the note. Underneath "Don't forget your lunch"my roommate had scrawled，"Thanks!”

　　第二天早上，我看見了條子，來到了冰箱前，卻發現我的午飯不見了。我順著原路，到了那張紙條前仔細一看，在我那張寫著“不要忘記帶你的午飯”的紙上，我的室友在下邊寫下了“謝謝”。