七年級英語笑話小短文
笑話是一種流傳廣泛為人民群眾所喜愛的文學樣式。一篇好的笑話,總是以短小的篇幅、精煉的語言、諷刺的手法,表達一個引人發笑的故事,在笑中寓有深義,發人深思,促人戰鬥,使人猛醒。下面是小編帶來的,歡迎閱讀!
篇一
Beef Sandwich
牛肉三明治
A man went into a deli shop and took a seat at the lunch counter.
有一名男子走近一家熟食店,在吃午餐的櫃檯旁選了一個位置。
"Give me corned beef sandwich,"he ordered.
他點餐時說:“給我來個醃牛肉三明治。”
"Corned beef sandwich is not on the menu,but I can give you a sandwich with corned beef in it,like our midnight Special."
"選單上沒有醃牛肉三 明治,但是我可以給你一個裡面有醃牛肉的三明治,像是我們的午夜特餐。”
"What's a Midnight Special?"
“午夜特餐是什麼?”
"A triple decker with corned beef,tongue,bologna,tomato,lettuce,onion,pockle andmayonnaise,on toasted raisin bread."
“有三層,裡面是醃牛肉、牛舌、薰香腸、蕃茄、萵苣、 洋蔥、醃泡菜,還有美乃滋的三層烤葡萄乾麵包。…
"Could you just place a piece of corned beef between two slices of white bread and serve it tome on a plate?"
"你可不可以在兩片白麵包中間只放一片醃牛肉,裝在一個盤子上端給我吃?”
"Why,sure!"Then,turning to the sandwich man ,
“哦,當然可以。啦!”接著他就轉向製作三明治的人,
he sang out:"One Midnighet Special.Make it one deck,hold thetongue,bolgna,tomato,lettuce,onion,pickle and mayonnaise,and make the raisin breadwhite,untoasted!"
大聲喊出:“一個午夜特餐。把它做一層就好,裡面不要加牛著、薰香腸、蕃茄、萵苣、洋蔥、醃泡菜和美乃滋,把葡萄乾麵包做成白麵包,不要烤!”
篇二
A drunk
醉漢
A police officer pulls over a guy who has been weaving in and out of the lanes.
有一位警官把一個在車道上穿進穿出,迂迴蛇行的男子攔到路邊。
He goes up to the guy's window and says "Sir,I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."
他走到這名男子的車窗旁邊說:“先生,我要你對著這個酒精測試管吹一口氣。”
The man says,"Sorry officer I can't do that.I am an asthmatic.If I do that I'll have a really bad asthma attack."
這名男子說:“對不起呀,警官,我不能吹呀。我是個氣喘病患者呀。如果我吹的話,我就會真的患很嚴重的氣喘病。”
"Ok,fine.I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample."
“ 好, 好。我要你到警察局進行血液檢驗。”
"I can't do that either.I am a hemophiliac.If I do that,I'll bleed to death."
“我也能抽血檢驗呀。我是個血友病患呀。如果我抽血檢驗,我就會流血過多而死呀。”
"Well ,then we need a urine sample."
“嗯,那我們就要你進行尿液檢驗吧。”
"I am sorry officer I can't do that either.I am also a diabetic.If I do that I'll get really low blood sugar."
“對不起呀 ,警官,我也不能驗尿呀。我也是一個糖尿病患者呀。如果我驗尿的話,我的血糖就真的會變得很低。”
"Alright then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."
“好吧,那我要你出來到這邊,走這條白線。”
"I can't do that,officer."
“警官,我辦不到呀。”
"Why not? "
“為什麼辦不到?”
"Because I am too drunk to do that."
“因為我喝得太醉了,所以不能那麼做呀。”
篇三
Apprehending Criminals
逮捕罪犯
The Los Angeles Police Department,the FBI,and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are thebest at apprehending criminals.
洛杉磯警察局、聯邦調查局和中央情報局,都想要證明他們最會逮捕罪犯。
The President decides to give them a test.
於是總統決定要考考他們。
He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.
他把一隻兔子放進森林,而他們每一個人都必須去抓它。
The CIA goes in.
中央情報局的人進去了。
They place animal informants throughout the forest.
他們在整個森林裡放置了動物通報器。
They question all plant and mineral witnesses.
他們質問所有的 植物和礦物證人。
After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.
就在三個月的密集調查之後,他們得到的結論就是兔子不存在。
The FBI goes in.After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest ,
聯邦調查局韻人進去了。就在兩個星期都沒有線索之後,
killing everything in it,including the rabbit,and they make no apologies.
他們放火把森林燒了,殺光了裡面的一切,包括這隻,兔子在內 ,而且他們並沒有表現出歉意。
The LAPD goes in.They come out two hours later with a baddly beaten bear.
洛杉礬警察局的人進去了。兩個小時之後,他們帶著一隻慘遭嚴重毆打的熊出來。
The bear is yelling;"Ok!I am a rabbit!I'm a rabbit!"
這隻熊大聲地喊著說:“好啦!好啦!我是兔子啦!我是兔子啦!”
中學生優秀英語演講稿帶翻譯